Uncertainty Again

Some people wished to know how everything developed between my lecturer and me, so this is part two about our special connection. Yes, for me it still feels special, even when my euphoria has gone. I'll tell you why.
Well, when I couldn't stand the situation anymore, I decided to speak about it during one of our work related meetings. So it became clear that he didn't have a clue that I'm in love with him. Damn ......! Of course he had to reject me saying that we have a professional relationship. There wasn't another possibility because I'm still studying there and he'll even correct my final paper. So I can't really say if he really doesn't have feelings for me or if the fact that I'm still studying was the reason. I really was so sure about the whole case. I know that universities are a world of its own with own rules but I really don't think that those looks are looks without a meaning. He still watches me. He never flirts with students, so it couldn't be a game. I've known so many lecturers so far, so I know that this isn't a normal case. Definately not! I also know he is a very friendly person but I feel there is something between us and I'll see how it'll develop. If he didn't mean it the way I want it to be, then I'll have to face reality one day. But I won't give up now, because he is so special to me. Never before I've met a person who I could trust from the very beginning. Usually confidence must grow. But with him it was already there. He remembers so many details about me, you just don't do this, if the person isn't important to you. He even asked for information about an incident that had to do with me.
One female lecturer noticed that we are in close contact.
I'll focus on my exams now and I'll see what will happen in the future. Whether it'll be no contact at all, a friendship or a relationship. But I really hope it'll be what I wish for so badly.
ready2fight ready2fight
31-35
Dec 2, 2012