*trips Over* Oh God Who Left Ep On The Rug?Soul searching feeling very much alone one day, contemplating if death would be simpler than living.. Wondering what happened to the man that had been in my life, reeled me in for a second third and forth time, wanting to find out what on gods green earth the mean to life was - tears streaming down my cheeks, face throbbing, I google the words "What is the meaning of life?" Christ the things that came back......this was one of them.
I sat there, confessed my heart out swearing at my ex for coming into my life - giving me a taste of what I wanted before ripping my heart out and leaving me alone again. College and CJ answered that confession, I looked round a little and discovered you could sign in here. I set up my account, and Littlemissnobody was born - a fictional character from a poem I'd written as a teenager. I thanked them for leaving comments and think I confused the **** out of them - I mean, what anon comes back and then says thanks?? I did.. I floated round here, reading and soaking the atmosphere up. I saw people interacting in this extra-ordinary land of ep, the jokes, gags etc floating round and just wanted to belong. I cried the first time I saw the words "Welcome Home".
I hid, got blocked - never did work out why.. and just added a few stories - then I started meeting people. Rick, you were one of the first people I talked to on here and god did I cling to our conversations! K, my first official voice call..ugh and to think we didn't talk because of all that crap that went down..... Jeanette, you've stuck by me through thick and thin, Philip - all the way.. I found me broken bits and pieces here and there in people around me. I found my first true love, a few fake adorations along the way, playmates by the score. I got restaurant, a fan club, a little sister, and so many more people who have become cherished family members, a marriage proposal, and god the things I learnt about myself one night with pictures... *head in hands* what a night! I discovered what the words "I love you" can make you feel, and what happens when they get taken aside moments later. What it is to truly want someone above all else, and what is left of a life not fully lived. Most of all I learnt that no matter what I call myself - I'll always be me. Even with the name change, I'm still me.
So, Me I'll be... like it states on my facebook page if you it - For those who know me, you know the drill... for those who don't your loss NEXT ------>