True Love - Behind Closed Doors - Emotional Cheating Online

july of 2012. i entered into a online virtual game world In this game you dress avatars and design clothes and get rewards for it. Just a Game i thought. after a while i met this guy we started just simply talking about stuff. Mostly our lives, hopes, dreams, and thing we like to do.

after some moths had passed i noticed that he was getting on more more. just to see me. then words like "i think i love you" would come up. me still in my game mode was just like no. "you just like my personality" but no those words just kept coming up.

and finally one day i was face staring and kinda felt a certain way. I brushed it off and told my self it couldn't be no way.

i noticed that this show called catfish was on. so i thought to my self to add a picture. but i wanted to be safe because it was online so i used another picture one who wasn't me.

i know i know bad call. the more we talked the more we got used to the role. he was my boyfriend now and we decided not to engage in sex with others.

eventually after fighting it i finally told him that i loved him. and it scared the crap out of me because what was i doing. So instead of just taking it back i broke it off. "this was the first time"

so after a day or two i got back on this game. and he sought me out wanted to tell me how in love he was with me "all i could think was "its only been 3mths" cant be! In complete denial i believe i was.

well our relationship couldn't stay online so he asked if i would come see him. i very seldomly kept brushing off his request. because i knew that picture i used wasn't me and i didn't bother to change it.

he grew tired of me denying his request and he started hooking up with other gurls. This kinda made me mad and in spite . i tired to pursed him harder.he wasnt answering my calls anymore,i got nothing but i love you in text messages every two days. at this point we were complete done he had moved on.

but i was stuck in love with him still. i had stomach aches , and didn't want to eat. the more i thought about him the sicker i became. I didn't realize how much i did love him until he wasn't mines anymore.

i was seeking into depression and i had to tell someone what was going on with me. i turned to my sister who told me i was infatuated. a friend said it was obsession and attachment. and finally the church lady told me i was in love.

finally when i started to feel better about him moving on. I finally came out and told my husband of 6 years what i had done. "i fell in love with another man" i told him i explained deeply how ,why and when it occurred.

i explained that i felt unwanted, unlove and neglected by him. and then i tried to explain to him how he ignored all the Warning signs of me needing his attention. and most of it was due to xbox.

he actually understood and excepted his fault in this.but i was still stuck in love this guy i had met. more of my truth had to come out so in doing my husband decide to do some searching of his own. he found his number. Eugenes number. That called change everything. All of a sudden ej started calling me texting me ,any way he could he tried to get in touch with me. and because my love wasnt resolved i fell for the bait. probably even feel harder because now Ej was fighting for me and so was my husband.

this is where it get confusing. i started talking to ej more and more. I literally could not go a day without talking to him. falling more and more in love even though he had dumped me for another girl. it was so easy for me to forgive him and i had no idea why. Is this boy the love of my life even thou i had a husband. lost i was very.

my husband in tears crying ,begging me not to go but my heart had already settle on Eugene. so i did some searching i agreed to counseling and marriage work with in that time no contact with Eugene what so ever.

well that didn't quit work. Eugene full force started calling more than ever. How could i possibly forget about him. 2 months gone by and im still battling my love. for my husband and for my new love. trying to figure out what love is.

what do i do .

ej dosent know who i am. he still think im the gurl in the picture .

but he makes statements like he will love me no matter what .

do i risk losing my husband and all that we have built but possible never having that love for him like i love ej.

the next part in my story isnt written yet . . .

amo12 amo12
31-35, F
Jun 5, 2013