The Best Thing I Could Of Done:

I know alot of people think its the wrong thing to do, but my life was so complicated, and still is..

I already had 3 abortions at the time, and when I found out I was pregnant at 16 weeks, I couldnt do it, I know it is still legal to get an abortion at that time, but the baby was forming, so I just couldnt handle getting rid of another one..

The reason at the time I had to put my baby up for adoption is because I was in an abusive relationship, I was only 16 at the time, I was an illegal teen prostitute and I was a drug addict at the time...

It was a baby girl, and I was very lucky that my bestfriends sister was trying but couldnt conceive, and she was happy to adopt her. I havent seen her ever since she was born, not even a picture and I dont want to, because i think it would break my heart and I wouldnt cope...

Even if that didnt happen and I fell pregnant now, i would of still put her up for adoption, even though im older and been to rehab and been clean from drugs for a while now, but I would still do it due to my work and I dont want her to be in a situation with her mum as a part time prostitute to pay bills, and I dont think I would be able to give her the best opportunity some one else can
beautytakesatoll beautytakesatoll
18-21, F
1 Response May 2, 2011

"Prostitute.." psh.. what a label. Remember, you're always human. And imo, it's tragic what you have to do, but don't ever label yourself in a way that tends to have a bad reputation in our societies, cause then you might believe it. The label is there to explain what you do, but it doesn't tell you who or what you are. Remember that, cause you have a lot of potential (and are still very young.) Don't ever feel too guilty (even though I know the pain will always be there for intimate motherly reasons) just keep moving forward and know that there's a reason for everything. There are also other manners of making money, like online, using your creativity and skill (even if you think you have none, you do... they're just unexplored.) <br />
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Sorry, I know this seems out of topic, I guess I was just addressing what sounded like a lot of guilt on your part. Your daughter and you will always have a special connection, even if you don't ever see her, or eventually do: