GAD Resurfaced

I've had this problem come and go since I was a kid. It resurfaced just after I had turned 21. Never did I notice the breathing as a problem as a kid. Then all of a sudden. Wham! One night I was sitting in my chair and started hyperventilating. I haven't been the same since. I worry all day long about my health and basically life in general. Tried meds and they did control it, but didn't like the idea of being on meds. As I'm sitting here typing this, I'm having trouble breathing/concentrating. I have OCD along with this. Always believe I'm sick and looking to prove I am which doesn't help very much. I've given up on doctors for help due to personal experience and watching the deaths of 2 close family members over a period of 3 years. I'm afraid I won't wake up next morning. Right now my neck hurts, my face is numb, chest hurts and these random thoughts keep plaguing me. "I wonder if I can make it to work tomorrow?" "Do I have some disease." I'm an alcoholic. Became one after the attacks. I'm lonely. Paranoid. Just want help, but can't seem to make it to the right people for treatment. I know everything I think and do is irrational. Just can't seem to fix it or convince myself of that.
lostinmania lostinmania
26-30, M
1 Response Aug 8, 2007

Reading ur story was like reading my own. How old are you