A Step Forward?

I feel like I don't fit into modern society but really from what I see every day it saddens me that I am forced to be part of it. It seems to me that most people these days have lost all comprehension of basic morals. There is a selfish attitude with most people and respect and decency seem to have gone out the window. Young people drink too much, swear and fight in the streets and have lost respect for older people and those in authority such as the police. There is no understanding of the sanctity of marriage and young girls, barely able to look after themselves leave alone a child, end up pregnant. Some choose abortion as a way of dealing with this unwanted pregnancy because "it is the woman's right to choose". Nobody ever stops to think about the right of the child or that 99% of the time, the pregnancy was the result of irresponsibility if not criminality. If the unfortunate child is lucky enough to survive, he or she can look forward to a future of being raised by couldn't careless parents in a world where health and education are taken care of, only if you or the local authority can afford it and entertainment is a grotesquely graphic video game where you score points for shooting prostitutes and stealing cars!
There is no sense of community and the work ethic has been eroded away. People no longer take pride in doing a job well done but in how much money they can make and what possessions they have to show for it. It's not surprising that crime rates continue to rise because there are no real consequences. It's an easy life for a criminal, judicial sentences are short and they even have the audacity to claim their human rights are not taken care of when they cannot continue to use illegal drugs.
We are encouraged to be "Multi-cultural" but really that means that we are forced to accept that Christianity and our own culture are dumbed down but other religion and culture gets a leg up. Before I get a barrage of hateful comments about that last view point, I am not racist. I would very much like to share the world in a peaceful and respectful way with everyone but I just feel that this is an unachievable dream right now.
RobertaSunset RobertaSunset
36-40, F
7 Responses Jul 17, 2010

Morality comes from religion and most modern religions are broken. Orthodox Judaism is one of the few that still works, but it doesn't work for me. Anyone who wants morality must find a religion that actually supports morality. If anyone knows of such a religion, please let me know.

One thing that doesnt seem to get importance as much as it should, is the role and example of parents, not just their preach and expectation to teens. When we mention media affecting teens, even worse is when it affects parents. If the parents, who are adults, are not able to shirk off what is thrown at them, how does one expect the teens to do it ?

How many parents, for example, are ready to go for a certain lifestyle, inculcate some self-discipline on themselves (because thats the word they use for teens) and bring in some sacrifice of their indulgences, mainly for the reason that their teens are in their formative years ?

In the kid's development, three things form an equilateral triangle. The home, The school and the society (media + friends + books + internet + all else).

It's clear that the school arm is clearly diminishing because there seems to be little that can be done by way of individual attention for a wholesome self-development.

It's also clear, that the society's arm is lengthening, because the teens are impinged on all sides with inputs they can't make sense of, or end up making the wrong sense of. The society's role was to come last, fenced and nurtured by the parent and teacher, now that giant is on its own path. From the kid's view, society is really like that jumbo animation standing before the Lilliput rat (see thats why they like such things).

The parent's arm has developed it's own ailments. They feel, they are becoming less and less in control of the children's shaping and development. Quick to blame the school and the society, what they don't realize is, they have just the 2 or 3 minds to handle whereas the school and society has tens or hundreds of such minds to handle. They also suffer from another ailment called broken homes. They are battling their own marital, economic, sexual struggles, the teen kid gets tucked in between, as an also-ran and an issue to handle. (Okay, that was harsh). Another ailment is "back wen we were kids, you know" types, not realizing that the other arms, at that time, didn't suffer from their ailments with as much severity and their parents, at an earlier time, had a more clearer role than they do today.

Three big nurturing arms are suffering their own ailments and, amidst all this, somehow we want the teens to see sense. They are blinking inside what was supposed to be an equilateral triangle and getting pulled by whichever arm gets pulled at whichever time. They are expected to display "maturity", "long -term thinking" or their lesser equivalents. Frankly, sometimes, all they get is a huge amount preach and a miniscule amount of practice from wherever they see around.

You know what, I'll dare to be extreme, just for a moment, although it's not my standard view. I won't blame the teens at all. Even a weebit. For the mess we created of ourselves and for the ability/inability to pull ourselves together and set forth caring, loving and inspiring examples, this is what we get. Because, thats what we deserve.

And hey, I am the wrong guy to ask on parenting. :-) :-)

This morning I dropped my kids off at school and as I was leaving the play ground, a fight broke out... not between children, no.. I would accept that that is part of normal growing up but between parents! Grown women who frankly, should know better. Luckily the kids were going into school at the time so I hope not many saw them, but it's a sad sign of the times that anyone should witness such a thing.

Yeah, as a society, we need to choose what goes or anything goes. We may choose "anything goes", we may have the freedom (and not necessarily the sanity) to do that. But then we shouldn't be surprised when our children come up with their own version of "anything goes".

The Society has lost the real meaning for Love. I am not going to be negative towards teens as I feel for them too as they have been programmed by the media to behave the way they do. Certain things that people can't do because it is against the law also probley really hurt a person especially if it something emotional level. Teenagers need love (Not just sexual) as well and that is something they don't get in society I expect even from their parents.

I came across a couple of teeenagers who had a lot of sense who has made me see them differently, I believe they were put in to my life to get me to understand indivual teens so I don't stereotype them all as bad which I have done previously. When I saw that teenage boy in the swimming pool also criticising the society because I gave him a blunt answer on something that is what made me realise they are not all bad.

Another reasons why people may be nasty is probley insecurities they may have including self hate (Beauty obsessed people who check their weights and take drastic measure to resolve a problem). People who are not true to themselves as well can be hostile towards others and when they find the truth (Self reflection) it can really hurt at 1st and when they realise they may appreaciate it if they learn to accept self and a person will feel a lot better. Modern society is making people not be true to themselves. Not reflecting on to yourself is believe to be another cause of negativity which I had for while.

I personally don't want to bring children in to this society after knowing how corrupt it is.

Well you speak a lot of of sense and I am not down on teens either, I do think that society as a whole is failing young people and it's sad that the future isn't as bright as it could be but by being aware you can work to provide balance and hopefully put right some of what's wrong with society. I don't think you can always say a beauty obsessed person is nasty either, many of those types of people are actually sick, they don't realise they are sick and they use food and weight as a way of controlling how they feel emotionally, kind of like "if my thighs were smaller, this problem I'm feeling would be smaller too".

You are very right justme, parents do have a lot to answer for, they need to step up their game and show their kids some discipline. I am not down on teenagers either but it seems that more and more are becoming out of control and this needs to stop.

The planet is only over populated because people keep bringing children into the world without first securing a safe, loving and respectful base to raise them. For too many people, children are seen as an income rather than an extension of love in marriage and that is just adding to our problems. Raising children is like tending a garden, you have to put lots of care an attention in if you don't want your garden an unmanageable jungle of weeds. Only the other day my husband and I were visiting my mother in law and as we left, we caught a group of young boys attempting to let down the tires of all the cars in the street. My husband gave them a good telling off and they ran off, but these days it would be pointless taking them back to their parents because they would probably just give you a mouthful or even praise the behaviour.<br />
As for sex rainchild, I am not a prude, I have experienced sexual relationships in an out of marriage. If I could turn back the clock, this would be different, but unfortunately, we cannot undo our mistakes. To a point, I did enjoy sex before I was married, but I can tell you that it is 110% better when you are in a loving and trusting relationship, you feel safe to experiment and you know each others bodies better than you know your own. When Sex becomes about making love, not just purely physical gratification, something magical happens. That, believe me is well worth waiting for.

"and aren't bothering with children because they're even more hassle than a relationship. Ah well..."<br />
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Where have you heard this? The planet is overpopulated, more so every day... and the natural inclination to raise and nurture children is always going to be there in the majority of people.<br />
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Right now I personally have little inclination to be one half of a two-person unit, commonly known as a "couple", I believe, because the idea of it serves no worthwhile purpose for me right now, other than sexual... but I do intend to couple up and raise a family within my lifetime. <br />
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Any chance you're just a bit of an all-round pessimist, in regards to the younger generations, justmeonline?

Whilst I don't personally agree with a lot of your ideals, I do also feel that we all suffer from a diminished sense of community... my point being that, outside of religion and senior centres, people don't seem to put in a whole lot of effort towards collaborating in community building programmes, exercises or general ways of life.<br />
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I feel it would be nice to talk to strangers without needing to embrace blind faith, go to a place where one is expected to consume state-altering substances such as alcohol or wait out my years 'til I'm a senior citizen...<br />
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I do try to explore my options, I've recently joined a Community Theatre group, for example, but I do feel the choices are limited.<br />
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For the record, I also think sex is awesome and that you don't have to deny yourself of pleasures to be a good person. There is somewhere where our ideals certainly are not on the same page ;)<br />
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Thank you for posting.. hope your life's coming together more so each and every day.. take it easy!