I "feel" Songs

For me, music is so invasive into my mood that I sometimes just cannot listen to anything... I either have to be in that song's mood already, or be ready to get into that mood... Because if I turn the music on it will slowly try to make me feel like the song does... I can almost never say, at a random moment, what song I'd like to hear.

Certain songs will always bring up certain memories too... And it sucks, because there are songs I used to love because they made me feel a certain way or think about a certain person and now I DREAD hearing them because they remind me how I USED to feel that way or how I USE to feel about that person.

Over time sometimes that changes. To this day, now, I identify strongly with Hotel California because it made me think of a certain girl I knew in high school. We did a history project together once about the civil war and she'd invited me to her apartment so we could work on it. She played (and sang, she was wild) this song while I was there. Now that she's out of my life (and in a certain respect my memory of her is like having seen a ghost-- something I thought was there but wasn't) when the lyrics get to the part about all of the pretty, pretty boys she calls "friends," and how they dance in the courtyard, some to remember and some to forget... It's totally about her. I have never been able to decide one way or the other if I'm dancing there to remember or to forget, though.

Lol. If by some weird coincidence of fate "MT" ever reads this, know that I still think about you! And every time this song comes on I feel just like I did that day. :)
Tybris Tybris
31-35, M
May 9, 2012