Everywhere I Go There Is Always Something Annoying Me

This has been happening for as long as i can remember.  Let me start off with saying , that most every noise bothers me ex: gum popping, pencil tapping, leg shaking, wheezy breathers, whistlers, seriously the list goes on and on.  Once as a young boy i kicked my grandfather under the table for chewing with his mouth open. which in turn did nothing but make me look like i was crazy for being effected so dramatically by something no one else could understand. since then i've learned that physical outbursts are not the way go.  so i started to ask people nicely if they wouldn't mind making said noise.  that turned out to vocalize my obvious issue with noises and led the ones closest to me to act like they were walking on eggshells. something i didn't want them to have to do and actually made me feel bad about pushing them to that point.  Since then i have learned that i can always walk away, even in the most non-oppotune times. even this has its downfalls. primarily people not understanding why.  It has been a lifetime on going and daily process to figure out how to just get over it. obviously i'm not having any luck.   One of my biggest concerns is when it comes to intimate relationships.  Things always start off perfectly. the "pink cloud" of love hides all of my imperfections and seems to numb them as well. As we all know, things change. slowly and surely the inner annoyance in me starts to show. (something i wish i could lock in a vault and hide away forever). And a vague  understanding is reached. But... it keeps going and going until the comfort level arises and i'm at my  full max power annoyance level with literally everything going on around me. ultimately   this leads to petty arguments, bickering, so on and so forth.  I absolutely hate that i cant just tune out noises. i hate the feeling of being annoyed. all-in-all im sick of my life being based around how the next thing i find to annoy me is going to affect me.   is there anyone out there who has ever felt this way or delt with any situation related to mine?    -i just want to fix it, to fix my life, and feel normal for once..-
jono2132 jono2132
26-30, M
Oct 12, 2011