One Of A Kind.

 We met over Facebook, through a group we both were in. We had a couple of mutual friends, friends of my friends stuff like that. One night, I was online really late and we got talking through comments on a post. Pretty soon we were on chat and we found something that connected in each other. He was like me, crazily creative, but had a weird way of showing it and so people tended to ignore him. But I liked that about him and I wanted to know more. So naturally, I was thrilled when he asked me for my number and hoped that I didn't find it desperate. I told him that I didn't of course.
                            From there on, it was a roller coaster. We'd text late into the night, trading verses, witticisms, contemplating deep and wonderful things. Then one night, one thing led to another and we started flirting, really heavily. It was nothing like I had experienced before (it WAS my first time exchanging texts of that nature) and he could get me all hot and bothered in no time. It then proved to be too much and I started questioning our relationship in a few days. After a mutual agreement we stopped, but we would still text. He was different, an almost bad boy kind. He'd get stoned and drunk and still I dint feel that it wasn't right.
                              He was 7 years older than me but that hardly mattered. I wrote and gave him a short poem about our short, yet heated and intense interlude. He liked it and told me that my emotional allusions were spot on. I told him he was more the intellectual creative type and that we should collaborate or something. All this happened in the space of two weeks but I got too attached, too clingy. If he'd stop texting I'd make a big drama of him forgetting me and all that and he'd reassure me saying that he didn't. I believed it and then he'd do it again and my fragile security would come crashing down once more. He'd been in relationships before. I had not and thought I was falling for him.
                           It became like a game, to see if he could properly talk to me, communicate. If he didn't return calls or texts I'd wait a few days, being stubborn that if he didn't want it then I won't push it, but I'd break and call him to see what was the matter. He was the more let things be kinda person so when I quietly seethed to him (I never yelled or fought) he'd just take it. And when I apologized for it, he'd say 'I prefer to look on the rosy side of things'. I must have bothered him a lot. When I told him that, he said that I wasn't and that he'd text whenever he could as he was busy, that egos had no place in friendships. But he didn't live up to that. Countless number of messages were never returned. My despair grew.
                          One day, I confronted him about all the pent up emotions and feelings I had. He told me that a relationship between us wouldn't work (as I was looking for something like that) and that I should just wait or get with someone else. He asked me how exactly I felt about him and I let slip the fact that I sometimes fantasize about him. He was very curious and I told him all. He started cursing then and on asking why, he told me he wished that I was older, but since I couldn't separate the physical from the emotional it wouldn't matter. Both of us were extremely turned on and when I told him I was sad that I couldn't have him, he laughed saying what a statement!
                             A week more passed and I still wasn't settled. I'd nag him about the flirting he did on the group with other girls, ask him if he liked them or had talked to them before. He'd snigger and correctly ask me if I was jealous but I'd deny it. Then one day, at around 1 in the morning I called to tell him that I had made my peace with him. It was true, because I had thought about it for a long time for many days. The poor guy was confused as we weren't fighting, so I told him about the struggle I had had with myself. Then he told me that we could still be friends and I said of course, we will. Then we talked some more and he confessed about having a crush on this girl in the group. That made me laugh and I told him that crushes seemed out of place for his age. I was naive, but he took it sportively.
                            I was over it I thought. But he'd still ignore me. I'm not sure if it was deliberate. Childish things would get to me, like if he didn't tag me in a picture that all the rest of the group was tagged in. Or if he wouldn't chat properly. It finally came to a peak, one morning. I was chatting with a girl from the group and she told me that she was having this pointless conversation with him. Not a lot of people understood him. My interest was immediately piqued and I asked her, who started it? When she replied that he had, I thought, so he's not as busy as he says he is. I casually said hi to him on chat. No reply. And he had gone from subtly flirting with one girl to most of the girls on the group. I couldn't take it. I knew, for my peace of mind's sake that I had to get away from it all. So I left the group, unfriended him on Facebook and deleted his number, even though I knew it by heart. 
                            I texted him after all that though, to let him know about my college admission, a few days back. We sent a few texts back and forth and then this awkward pause that I had become used to, that had pained me before but strangely didn't now. Maybe because I was expecting it. I prompted him, one last time and he apologised saying he almost fell asleep. I told him he should probably sleep then and we said good night.
                           I haven't met him in person but I feel like I know him a lot, yet not enough. I got attached too easily and maybe it'll never go away, this longing I have. He'd say that I would meet people like him and that I was still young, when I told him that he was different somehow. My heart does a small jump every time I see his name. I'm not sure why, it was just two months. Maybe he's one of a kind.
Treshes Treshes
18-21, F
1 Response May 9, 2012

you'll get over it. it takes the chemical bonding of intercourse to maintain a relationship. internet romance alwayz fizzles if the people don't meet in reality. otherwise, it's just fantasy.

Well thank god for that :) Thanks!