IS Jealousy a Sign of a Person's Insecurity?

WHEN I FIRST MET MY BOYFRIEND I TOLD HIM I WASN'T THE JEALOUS TYPE, WHICH I WASN'T BUT NOW I AM! HE HAD TOLD ME ABOUT A GIRL HE LIKED AT HIS JOB. I GUESS SHE HAD A BOYFRIEND BUT LIKED HIM TOO! HE NEVER DID ANYTHING WITH HER BECAUSE HE KNEW HER BOYFRIEND AND ISN'T DISRESPECTFULL. I GUESS SHE MOVED AWAY OR SOMETHING.

ANYWAYZ...LATER SHE FINDS HIM ON MYSPACE AND I GUESS THEY WOULD TALK. ONE DAY WHEN I SAT NEXT TO HIM AND HE WAS READING HER MESSAGE HE SUDDENLY STARTED SCROLLING UP AND DOWN, THEN DELETED ALL THE MESSAGES IN HIS INBOX..WHCH MADE ME SUSPICIOUS. OH, AND SHE SENT HIM COMMENTS SAYING THAT SHE WAS THINKING ABOUT HIM (I DON'T KNOW IT COULD BE HARMLESS AND I WAS JUST TRIPPING). ANYWAYS, I DECIDED TO LET HIM KNOW HOW I FELT AND HE SAID THAT SHE WAS TRYING TO HIT ON HIM AGAIN BUT THAT HE TOLD HER HE HAD A GIRL. AND THAT HE DIDN'T WANT ME TO READ THE MESSAGES BECAUSE I WOULD PROBABLY GET THE WRONG IDEA AND GET MAD. WELL THAT PASSED BUT I WAS STILL JEALOUS AND KINDA INSECURE, WE USED TO ARGUE ABOUT IT A LOT UNTIL I TOLD HIM HE HAD TO DELETE HIS MYSPACE OR LEAVE! GOOD THING HE DECIDED TO DELETE IT BECAUSE I WOULD BE COMPLETELY HEART BROKEN! 

DO U THINK I OVERREACTED? WHAT WOULD U HAVE DONE?

swtmorena swtmorena
18-21, F
7 Responses Jan 18, 2007

I think you did the right thing. He didn't have to delete his myspace, but he chose to as he wanted to stay together with you. But I would still stay alert... I deleted my facebook, because my hubby asked me to. <br />
<br />
I thought <br />
1)I can keep my wonderful man but be without my facebook <br />
2)I can keep my online profile and walk all over my husbands feelings.

If his feelings were not reciprocal why did he not simply block her account? He is lying!

If my fiance ever asked me to delete my MySpace, Bebo, Facebook etc, I'd be furious! OK, it's slightly odd that he deleted the messages but I also think you overeacted by asking him to delete his page.<br />
<br />
Sorry if any of you think I'm being harsh - I'm just giving my opinion on the situation.

You go girl! If he wouldn't have deleted it, I would have been suspicious. He obviously cares about you. I hate girls that try to steal your man.

I would have done the same thing... any man who is really true would have done the same thing just to make his girlfriend at ease about the whole situation...

i dont think you overreacted. i can understand you getting angry since he started deleting the messages. i would take that as an act of guilt on his part. there was probably some flirting back and forth between them that he felt guilty about. i used to always get so angry with my husband when he'd look at **** online, the **** itself wouldn't anger me, its the fact that he quickly deleted whatever he was doing or turned the computer off real quick, which of course made him look guilty but he really wasnt doing anything wrong. just try to keep good communication between the two of you and everything should end up alright.

I think I wold have been a bit suspicious too, if he deleted everything when he realized you were there. How long have both of you been dating because i think that factors into the equation. I just recently started stating a man and he came clean saying he felt very jealous and that he knew he had no right to be because i had not given him any reason to be, but he admitted due to his ex-wife he had gotten use to women not telling the truth and doing things behind his back. Because our relationship was brand new we talked it out and i offered to close down my profile on the dating site where i met him. This i told him would be a temporary thing until he felt more secure because at this site there are chat rooms and once you become a regular in a chatroom you end upmaking friends, and i said once he felt more secure i would like to go back in the chat room and just chat with my friends. So we have put a time fr<x>ame on our deal to see if it helps him getting over his jealousy and in a sense that is what your b/f did for you. He could have said no to your request, had he said no then i definately would have thought something migh be wrong. But since he had no problem in shutting it down he is stating that he cares more about you the his profile on my space, so i hope that makes you feel better. Perhaps when you feel more secure you can thank him for shutting it down and tell him if he wants he can put it back up because you know that you two are solid. Just a thought. Take care, Trish