i always feel sad and if i am happy even for a moment, someone or something comes along to kick me in the face and tell me i have no reason to be happy. why is it like that? why does everything have to be so hard? i guess that's realty. but why do some people have it easy? why not me? i wanna be happy like i used to be before. it just sucks. it's like you're not meant to be happy. i know thats bullshit but i can't find any oher explination. i used to believe that we make our own happiness but now i don't have the strength to get up and do it. i just don't wanna be like this anymore.