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Shelter Me....

Sometimes life is hard, unkind and it feels like we never seem to catch a break.  We have no control over what we are dealt only how we deal with those
things.  I too find myself overwhelmed at times never wanting others to see any weakness, sadness or emotional struggles that we all face now and then.  I know God never gives us more than we can handle but right now it's hard to believe that and I cling to that fact and I know He is there for me, supporting me.  

Being human with all my flaws, I still crave the love and strength of a strong man,  my safe harbour in the storm,  my soft place to land,  someone who at the end of the day will shelter me and protect me from all the the world can throw at me.  I rarely, if ever, am allowed to let this facade down with someone and to just breathe and feel safe in their presence.  What would it feel like to be cradled and cherished, protected and cared for?  To have that vulnerablity with another person, and perhaps allow them to help carry the load for awhile.  I know if he needed this from me I'd have no problem being all this for him, because that is simply who I am.....a woman with a heart that doesn't stop giving.


I am also aware that one can be "strong" with no real outlet for only so long before the mask begins to crack.  I am praying that I find him before mine shatters....until then I'll keep praying, seeking wisdom, guidence, patience and strength.....day by day.   
desertrosebud desertrosebud 36-40, F 5 Responses Mar 20, 2012

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That person is out there and you will find the one who completes you.

My heart is open and ready....thank you.

Jess, thank you for your kind words and believe me I do at times, probably not enough, but always on my drive home after my swim...it's like clock work (but it's a short drive). You are very sweet. Thank you for making me smile.

Your strength is admirable, but you're allowed to have your moments of weakness every once in a while. Scream, cry, throw something; just vent. It may not work for everyone, but sometimes after your moment of 'weakness', its easier to move on.

I appreciate your response and I do realize I haven't given any details as to my particular hardships at this time, I am blessed with many friends, hobbies and talents and in spite of what is on my plate at the moment, as difficult as it is, I do fairly well dealing with things in the light of day.....however late at night I let my guard down and begin to feel all that I push aside during the day.<br />
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I know a man isn't the all out answer but it is the piece to my puzzle that I find missing. Friends are great and supportive to a point (everyone is busy with their own lives and trials as well), my projects and hobbies keep me productive and busy, and I find my meditation/prayer time throughout my day, especially during my hour long (plus) swims each night. <br />
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Being a caretaker for a beloved family member and watching them deteriorate daily, is just a little more than I can handle at times. I know it is not forever...sadly knowing what this means, I have no regrets and try to cherish the time we have left. I guess the shelter I seek one day will help make these trying times a little more bearable. <br />
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Thank you again, take care.

I understand that life is hard, and I am sure you will eventually meet that special someone, but that shouldn't just be what life is about.. Have you any hobbies, or could you join any clubs to enhance your social life? You sound like you have had some knocks in life and need to learn to be your own best friend before you meet someone. It is important to have many things in your life, friends, work, social time, time to exercise, perhaps study even to learn about spirituality a little more. It doesn't need to be church, but you do sound like you are aware there is more to this life and God is mentioned so why do you read up about spirituality. All the while you are keeping yourself busy you may forget that you are looking for someone and that is when you are likely to meet someone special as you will not come accross overly dependant, you will be more of your own person.<br />
Have you ever tried yoga/meditation? This is very calming to the mind and gets you in contact with your own intelligence, which will guide you to what you should be doing in your life to improve it. It will also ease the knocks and strains of life. These are all just suggestions as life can be very difficult, but you need to build yourself a support network and a life and yourself up, this way you will attract someone that will see the real you, and you will more likely have a happier relationship as a result. I wish you the strength to carry on. Best Wishes :-)