Just Told The Gf About Crossdressing....

So, last night we were sitting at home having a quiet night and I decided to bring up what had been bothering me the last few weeks....

She went away with her family a few months ago and I slept holding her bra every night (I'm uncomfortable when she's not here and have a hard time falling asleep). I spray it with her perfume that I love and I feel close to her. Anyway, I wore it a few nights while she was gone and I kind of liked it.

I started looking into cross-dressing shortly after that: breast forms, clothing, voice emulation, etc, but I didn't want to tell her right away, nor did I know how!

In the last few weeks, I purchased a few things online: push-up panties, jeans, shirts, tank tops, as well as seriously considering a $300 pair of realistic breast forms!

When I told her last night, it didn't go as I'd hoped (though I wasn't fully optimistic to start with...) and she said if I buy any women's clothes and wear them, she will probably leave me. After talking about it for a while, her telling me it was a problem and I needed help, me telling her that it's not a problem and just something I've wanted to experience and that I would love her help and support, we decided not to discuss it further.....

I don't know what to do, now. We've been together 5 years and we've been through a lot and I love her immensely, but I also don't want to miss out on an exciting experience. If it comes down to it, I'll give it up to keep her, but I'd rather have both!

I don't think she understands my reasoning or why I want this and I honestly don't blame her; I'm not sure how I'd react in her place...
I'm straight and I love her and I don't want to BE a girl. I have always thought that women have far more power over men than it's fair to have and that they get all the nice clothes. And, they have breasts. Who DOESN'T want those?? I like the feeling of the fabrics and the look of the clothing and I want to go out in public as a girl: see what they see, talk like they talk, get stared at. I want to put in the effort to pass flawlessly and then go back to being a man.

I think women are beautiful and captivating and I've always enjoyed learning as much as I can about them: how they think, how their bodies work, what they look like ;) and I feel this is simply an extension of that curiosity!

Am I wrong? Am I being utterly selfish? I don't know... I hope things calm down soon.
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Nov 25, 2012