2 (possibly 4) Is Enough! No More Kids For Me!I'm a divorced 35 year old father of 2 boys who's in a very committed relationship with a divorced mother of 2 girls.
We've been together a couple of years, and after she started having issues with birth control pills and both our dislike for condoms, I finally decided it was time to take the plunge and "man up" so to speak.
I talked with my doctor during a physical about it, he gave me a quick check and said it should be rather quick and painless for me, just talk with the staff up front or call in to make a appointment and he'd handle the procedure.
The only thing negative I have to say about the discussion or appointment making comes from after the fact and things I've read online about others getting instructions on "Get a jock strap" and what things to have on hand and ready for when I got home, but really in hindsight I'm not sure if that would have added more fear to the whole procedure or not.
It took me another 2 months to get up the courage to make the appointment, and once I finally did, that’s actually when the process began to get easier.
The first call in a male receptionist answered, “I’d like to make an appointment for a Vasectomy.” “Oh, um, I’ll have to check the doctors schedule and call you back when we can schedule your um... procedure.” They called back later that say scheduling me 3 weeks away.
The day before the doctor’s office called back, another female receptionist wanted to make sure I was still ok with the date and I’d be in, I couldn’t help but reply with “I’ll be there with balls on!” She had a hard time telling me a few things like I may need a ride home etc. Through her laughs.
“The day of” was the worst waiting I’ve even had. The appointment was for 4:30pm. I left work at 4 and the 15 drive seemed like a hour. Once I got there I started to relax a little, but due to some patient issue and many apologies from the staff, and even a offer to reschedule I told them I’d wait, I mean it was hard enough to come in once, did I really want to reschedule and go through this again? Finally about 6:30pm I was in, last patient of the day and more nervous than anything.
It was to be a single puncture open ended vasectomy, which I had read about and understood, I just wasn’t familiar with the process which the doctor said he’d explain as he went along.
He draped the area, taped my penis to my stomach, and washed the area with antiseptic and cleaners, quite the cold shock.
He then “arranged” things and manipulated things to find the vas, a little uncomfortable, but not too bad.
Then it was anesthesia time, which I was most worried about. It was a needleless procedure, but I still didn’t know what to expect. He said other patients had described the injections like “getting snapped by a rubber band” something I certainly didn’t want happening down there! But I braced for it, there was a slight ***** or cold feel when he got it in the right place, not really painful then the POP as it injected anesthesia. It was more a “flick” than a snap, not as painful as I expected, maybe as painful as a mosquito bite, with a little “kick”. 3 times on each side and that was over.
It affected me more than I realized, although it didn’t hurt suddenly I felt cold, shaky and then sweaty. My doctor talked me through it, but said I was pretty close to passing out, the bodies automatic reaction to shock and that if I did he might be finished before I came to. I never did pass out but it was touch and go for the next 5-10 minutes. It was never really painful, there was some tugging while he tied off one end of the vas, a little heat at he cut and cauterized, and pulling from time to time as things dropped back inside but it never really hurt.
I was done in about 30-40 minutes from the time we started, and after standing for about 10 minutes and him making sure I was ok I was free to go. My doctors only instructions were “2400mg of Advil in 24 hours”, ”check for infection”, “use gauze and polysporin bandages for the next day”, “don’t shower till the day after tomorrow”, and “come back in 3 months so we can make sure your fixed” .
I drove myself home, feeling a little cold (mind you it was -25C out) and was only a few blocks away. My girlfriend was waiting when I came in, gave me one look over and took me right to bed, apparently I was still quite pale and shaky (she’s a nurse, I figured I’d listen).
The most painful time of the entire procedure was the next 2-3 hours, it was more a dull pain and ache (not as bad as if you had been kicked in the balls, but that same feeling at a constant level). I cycled an ice pack on and off 10 minutes at a time (the nurse wouldn’t allow any more...) and after 3 hours or so it wasn’t that painful anymore. The most unexpected thing at that point and I’ve read a few other places was just how aroused and horny I suddenly felt. Two days before the procedure I had no libido, even the night before with my girlfriend I wasn’t able to “perform”, but suddenly I had quite the physical reaction and couldn’t’ think of anything else.
After googling anything I could think of, the only information I could find ranged from “you must wait a minimum of 72 hours” and “no sex for 2 weeks afterwards” to “resume activity when you feel up to it” and a survey showing most men resumed manual ******* on average 2 days after, and sex after about a week. I believed more in the “resume activity when you feel up to it” aspect of it, and although it may not be advised we had “gentle” intercourse (with additional protection) 5 hours after my vasectomy without problems or any pain.
The day after I also spent in bed, using ice on and off to control the ache. It wasn’t really painful, but getting up and moving around wasn’t comfortable, so relaxing was the best option. I did jump up once when the doorbell rang (pizza), bad idea, there was a little slapping and I felt a little shocky & shaky, the girlfriend sent me back to bed and answered the door. No more activity that day, but if she hadn’t gone to work that evening there most likely would have been, the constant feeling of being horny was still there.
The third day (or about 36 hours after my vasectomy) was much better, woke up with little pain, got up and made some breakfast, and emptied the dishwasher first thing. It wasn’t the most comfortable morning ever, and I was walking a little slow and careful, but not in pain or anything.
I still spent the day mostly in bed watching TV and taking it easy, I didn’t have any place I needed to be and well I was still recovering now wasn’t I?
The next day was back to work, a little sore, a little slow, but manageable, after 8 hours of deskwork and meetings I’m now home and cooking supper, I can still feel that something’s “not quite right” down there, but it’s nothing unmanageable.
In hindsight its already something I wish I had done a looong time ago but had put off out of irrational fears of how bad it would be. I decided 4+ years ago after my last son was born that I didn’t want any more kids, and now after years of condoms and/or pills, knowing that I’ll soon never have to worry about that is pretty reassuring and exciting.