I am new to this forum and surprised to see there are many parents out there who are estranged from their children. My situation is not complete estrangement, but I am not included much in my two boys' lives. The hurt I feel is so heart wrenching especially when I see the close relationship they have with their in-laws that have developed over the last few years. It's been difficult as my husband of 24 years and my boys' dad suddenly died 5 years ago. Since his death, a huge rift has developed and I don't know how to fix it. I have been to counseling and I just try to show them love without being too pushy.
Imagemaker630 Imagemaker630
61-65, F
3 Responses Aug 17, 2014

This is a lot to deal with, Imagemaker. I also have 2 sons who have both not included me in their lives after marrying. Each one has a baby daughter and I have not seen either of my grands. My sons are both contemptuous, abusive, and disrespectful to me. One DIL does not speak to me and the other does, but plays games with me. It has been a nightmare. However, my husband (the boys' stepfather) is alive and has been a good friend through all of this. I can only imagine the hurt, pain, and betrayal you must feel. Why are so many young people behaving this way?

This is sad and much less than what you deserve, especially as you lost your husband. Take heart in good friends, unlike our relatives, they don't have to know or like us, they actually choose to do so because of what they see in us. I wish you all the best. Enjoy as much as you can in life, whether that be pets, or travel, or whatever is your interest, as you deserve as much happiness as you can get, and certainly do not deserve this alienation from your children, but it is beyond your control.

Do hang in there. There are people here to listen and help.