It took me long enough to admit it.

I mean i realised i was bingeing and purging and all that jazz

But something didn't click in my head that i was actually suffering from a pretty serious illness.
I didn't even realise i've been doing this for 4 years until now. wow that denial haha..

Don't get me wrong, the first few years were pretty bad- i had my days of cutting and suicide attempts but i got past that somehow on my own. *yay*
Maybe thats why i'm not too unhappy with just being bulimic now.
That's the confusing thing, I'm not sad, i'm not depressed.. hell, i don't even care that i have some fat on me!

I really don't think i can be helped anymore, i'm too used to this messed up lifestyle- more of an instinct than an urge.

Is there even a point in getting help now?

(Ordering $35 worth of pizza for tonights binge purge at the moment) ha. ha.

hmm i don't know what i'm doing here, i just wanted to share.

Is there anyone out there like me?
kerryfofo kerryfofo
22-25, F
Aug 22, 2014