Revenge! Well, Not Really.

At EXACTLY 3:33 A.M. this morning, I entered my roommate’s room.

  A few quick notes about my roommate’s room: His room is VERY dark because he is the type of weirdo who puts aluminum foil over his windows so he can sleep-in without the early morning sunshine disturbing him. Also, he likes his room COLD, not just cold, but freezer COLD. In fact, even though our house is equipped with A/C, he installed a separate window A/C unit in his room and put those thick, plastic strips you see on some industrial freezers (the kind that dangle from the ceiling) in the door leading to his room.   In the near total darkness of my roommate’s room, my naked body alight with an eerie green glow (he had left his cable box on and the clock has a green LED), I cautiously stepped onto his bed and walked toward its center. I didn’t have to worry about my movements waking him or his girlfriend because this goofball, who doesn’t ever seem to have money for groceries, bought a king size tempur-pedic bed.   After moments of careful creeping, I finally found myself standing over my unconscious roommate and his girlfriend as they lay spooning. I eyed both of them to make sure they were still securely in Morpheus’ embrace then took my flashlight in one hand and aimed it at the ceiling. I’m tall, so the flashlight almost touched the ceiling and when I turned it on, it shone like some dim and dying star with its rays radiating out across the ceiling.   As I stood astride those sleeping fools, like the great Colossus of Rhodes, my shining flashlight in one outstretched hand, I smiled in triumph. After a few moments, the thrill of my adventure left me and I decided to take things a step further. I turned off my flashlight and put in my iPod earphones and cranked up the music. While “Maniac” blasted my eardrums, I psyched myself up for the next daring step. I began to dance. I danced carefully so as not to wake my sleeping roommate or his girlfriend, but dance I did!   There was a scary moment when his girlfriend turned in her sleep. She turned away from my roommate and faced the side of the bed, barely bumping into my leg. Needless to say, the surprise/fright of her unexpected movement caused my body to tense up and put an end to my dancing. At that point I figured I better get out while the getting’ was good. After I got off the bed, I started for the bedroom door, but I couldn’t leave. Not yet.   I quietly walked over to the side of the bed where his girlfriend’s face was and gingerly love tapped her on the lips with my Johnson. I just couldn’t help myself. Anyway that was the end of my latest raid. It’s a good thing he doesn’t have EP. Mwuhahaha!
TheEtherBunny TheEtherBunny
26-30, M
50 Responses Mar 21, 2009

Actually, he has received no such thing.<br />
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And shame on you for saying you served me in a cold dish of revenge by getting me with a joke when you didn't. Everyone knows if you're going to serve rabbit, you serve it as hassenpfeffer!

The best part is his real roommate has probably been getting text messages and voicemails saying "it's not true" <br />
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ha ha ha ha

Sometimes you must serve rabbit in a cold dish of revenge

A nd I just got Etherbunny and over 200 other EP members tonight <br />
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Etherbunny and I have been friends for many years and we have many of the same friends. Well tonight I got to play a joke on Ether by making him think his current roommate was told about the silly things he sometimes posts.<br />
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So I created an account with a name used by his roommate in other sites<br />
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Well poor Ether tonight got a taste of his own Ether so to speak.<br />
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And to all those lovin’ the drama well GOTCHA<br />
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XXOO<br />
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Das<br />
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P.S. Never mess with a smuggler

At least I got a Slushie out of this.

Gotcha Man

Gotcha

Hey go look at this posting <br />
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<a href="http://www.experienceproject.com/uw.php?e=492596" target="ep_blank">http://www.experienceproject.com/uw.php?e...</a>

hmmm I wonder who ether is calling then?<br />
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Must be someone out in the ether ha ha<br />
hmmmmm

nope, no calls

My roommate has been reading this here with me and Rod. We have the phone on speaker <br />
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Rod have you heard any calls on any other phone?

Sorry for the delay. I was on the phone with your roommate. It appears that we're both going to have unhappy homes for a while.

I'm going to charge him the cost of the locksmith

with all the things he types in here about me, are you crazy?

Thanks and do not let him sleep on your couch

damn, das give me that number for the locksmith

Well, this drama just turn a hard right hand turn. No pun intended.

I'm not PMing anyone. It's hard enough typing with one hand as it is.

That is just wrong. Very, very wrong.

Hey man if you think thats bad you should see the stuff he puts about me<br />
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<a href="http://www.experienceproject.com/uw.php?e=491113" target="ep_blank">http://www.experienceproject.com/uw.php?e...</a>#comment_em<x>bed

Here, we have Slushies!!

I sent you what pic?<br />
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man I knew you were crazy but I didn't know how crazy

Mmmm slushies.

Soda, alcohol, water, juice? Ooh, let's have Slushies!!

quit trying to pm me man say it here

locksmith is on his way ?

would it?<br />
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Thanks for the heads up Das

dopecounselor and TOCIC, we should get refreshments. Drinks and snacks?

You go right ahead and email him anything you want.<br />
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However...<br />
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"If" that were true. "If" you were to reveal my EP identity to someone, ESPECIALLY my roommate, that would be going too far, sir.

he's trying to call me, left a message that he was kidding<br />
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I'm not buying it

I think he ran away

I know the name of a good locksmith

This just keeps getting better and better.

yea the roomie who is changing his locks tonight

I told ya man, I said it.

What the Hell???

he asked about the invite to EP...<br />
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check sir there is a short note section<br />
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phone number to txt me and your user name lol

Yeah, you can delete whatever you want, but that won't help you. He just texted you?? Now I know you're full of it.

I just got a text from your roommate...<br />
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I think I have a good reply<br />
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yep it was a good reply

This is better than a soap opera. Well, most things are. Okay, this is more dramatic than a soap opera.

I can delete or edit mine<br />
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he saw yours heh heh

I wouldn't worry about MY post if I were you...

do your worst sir I showed him your post bwahahahaha

Yeah, I got a text from him and it was funny because he had a few choice things to say about you. Fortunately for me, however, he is quite susceptible to the Jedi Mind Trick.<br />
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If we're calling roommates, shall I make a call to yours?

I just called your roommate at work. <br />
I asked him if he had talked to you today. <br />
He said "no." <br />
I said "you should."<br />
I asked him how his new girlfriend is<br />
He wanted to know how I knew<br />
I asked him if he kissed her goodbye this morning<br />
He asked why<br />
I told him he needs to speak to his roommate<br />
He said "oh ****"<br />
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I think you just got a raise in your side of the rent<br />
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{evil laughter}

I've heard bits and pieces of this tale, TOCIC, and it ain't pretty. But, I'll pull up a chair with you.

very few very very few<br />
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Hey I do get points for invites sir and I've warned my roommate that you have strange fantasies about him. He said he doesn't listen to you anyway. He thinks you are a pervert and this is the guy who uses the sink as a bath.

The Boston Tea Party?

Sell me down the river on this and what I did to him will seem like a tea party compared to what I do to you, sir. Don't forget, I'm on good terms with YOUR roommate and I'm sure he could be bribed to allow me into your apartment while your asleep.<br />
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He has a g/f now. Who knows how long it will last, though. His women are few and far between.

I know your roommate and your roommate when he is not playing City of Heroes or WOW or some other online game craze does check his email... I believe it has Steel in the name... I wonder if I should send him an invite...<br />
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hmmmmmm<br />
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The only problem is when did your roommate ever and I mean ever have a GF?<br />
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Crazy J** does not count ha ha