She Was A Special Person

Last night she spoke to me..in a dream...said, "you know I miss you and I miss our talks?

She's been dead for many years now. When my husband and I were first married, we'd pick up Chinese food every Friday night and drive over to their huge upper West side apartment. We were in our 20's...Astor and Frank were in their late 70's, possibly early 80's.

We both loved going there...did it for almost 2 years, until Frank lost his job and they had to give up the apartment and move in with their son in Pennsylvania. We never talked about it...never really questioned why we were friends...and that's what we were...We didn't do much...just sat around and talked..they had great stories..we had a few good ones of our own...sometimes we'd all just sit there...no need to talk..sometimes my hubby and Frank would start talking work stuff and Astor and I would chat...once, before my marriage she pulled me aside and said, "Honey, I love him like my own, but think again about getting married...you're fire and he's water...he's gonna try and put your fire out...he can't help it that's who he is..." well I didn't listen but years later I remembered her prophetic words....

They were open and they were kind and oh sooo funloving! It was a time before cells phone and laptops...I can't recall most of what we shared but I do remember the feeling...so very relaxed...so completely accepted....I hope they felt the same.

I love electronic stuff just like most of my EP friends but I can't help but feel we've lost the art of converstion...just sitting around talking or not talking as the mood strikes us.

I miss you too Astor. ..very much...I never realized it before but you were family for me.

frito414 frito414
56-60, F
21 Responses Mar 5, 2010

Thanks Fish...Astor was the real deal! :)

:)

:)

Ah thanks Tasmin...she was like her name...I loved her very much. :)

Love your very evocative story frito and love the name Astor too

Tgilly...you're so right...they were "kindred spirits" ...and I believe all four of us felt it! :)<br />
<br />
LV...it is hard sometimes...this missing of old friends,,it was so nice to have Astor visit again. :)<br />
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Salar, I think it's a loss for anyone who has never experienced the sheer pleasure of just sharing a conversation with friends. :)<br />
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Thanks all! :)

The art of building a conversation for the pleasure of the company Frito is indeed a skill which many seemed to have lost or sadly have never pocessed .....

beautifully told, I am sorry for your loss.<br />
<br />
I do miss talking to my friends as well,

They were simply ...kindred spirits, we are drawn to certain people for a reason. I meet some people that i feel i have known forever.

Lilt , it is chilling and so prophetic! She was wise and loving and so full of life...even came to a party we threw with 2 rocks bands. :) <br />
I think I'm the only one who hasn't seen the woodpecker...yet...I'm watching! :)<br />
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Faucon, (and Juan) thanks for the woodpecker info!:)<br />
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Lauren, Astor and Katherine...both very special women...nice you had her in your life! :)<br />
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Paco, I'm so glad you like it. :)<br />
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Faucon, I'm looking forward to your stories about the rv folks! :)<br />
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Gryfnn, when they cpme back in our dreams it's as if they are really here again...and in a way they are....I believe it means something but I'm unsure of what it is. :)<br />
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RavenDelcor, I love your term "front porch) buddies...we can't have too many! :)<br />
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Thanks all!

When I was in therapy, I sighed and said to my therapist, "What I really need is a front porch buddy." Thanks!

I love my dream visitors....sometimes they are so real-- When they come it strengthens the hope that we are always connected to those we love or have loved....It's easy to believe that love really is forever.

:) thanks for that warm story by the fireplace. <br />
Paco:)

What a profound thing Astor said about your husband. That gave me chills. <br />
I have a friend like Astor. These wise older women are so "knowing."<br />
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I saw that woodpecker yesterday too!

Great:)<br />
<br />
While I do have these conversations they seem to often be outside my social sphere....I seem to have them with folks I'm just meeting.

I understand Juan...I have found such interesting people and shared conversations...at my Internet cafe and some other coffee places...I think we are both fortunate! :)<br />
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Faucon, maybe you'll share a story after you meet with your family to Yak or after the seniors move on from their road trip! :)<br />
I was a city kid...do all acorn woodpeckers have a red head?

I suppose I'm fortunate, Frito. For the past six years, I've worked alone in this office and have come to really miss the proverbial water-cooler chatter. Yet, my night gig puts me face-to-face with so many terribly interesting people, it has re-affirmed the fact that the art of quality conversation is alive and well.

Hahaha Yak, gab* *grin* is my kind of fun time! :)

It does give me a boost Juan...that she came to me after so many years. I feel honored.<br />
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Like you electronics has allowed me to meet so many I never would have...I just wonder about all the time so many of us spend one-on-one with our "toys".<br />
In my world I don't see as many face to face conversations any more...but it's great to hear that in your world they do thrive.! :)

I've known such dreams, and there is something very life affirming about them. With all these years gone by, and with the seperation of the living and those who've passed on, to know that you are remembered and appreciated, should give you a boost, Frito.<br />
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I find the art of conversation to be very much alive and well. The electronic age has broadened our horizons, and allowed us to meet people we might never have as well as remain in contact with friends and loved ones we might otherwise lose touch with. The face-to-face type continues to thrive, and always will.

I'm not surprised you understand what I mean Faucon. It sounds like a wonderful time...also sort of reminds me of camping and sitting around the fire. Enjoy...<br />
Astor is a beautiful name...she had a full but difficult life and was as beautiful as her name!