I had a rather strange dream and it was a very sad dream. I was at an old like castle that was having a ballroom dance much like those in fairy tales. And I didn't have a partner and it seemed like it bothered me and I was probably sad so I left the ballroom and for some reason I was searching for something and I used a special bracelet that was to help me find that what I was searching for. And it spoke to me to go see the old wise owl. And so I went threw darker older part of the castle threw many curtains and to where a large curtains are and before I enter another girl seems to push out the curtains and she is upset and angry and seems to be dressed like a princess and she has a servant following her who seems to be a guy very concerned about her the girl is yelling saying " That old owl doesn't know what he's talking about! He loves me and only me! I know it! " Or something among those lines.
And I'm surprised but I continue threw the curtains and the room I find myself is old and much like a work place with many old books and globes and gadgets.. But no one seems to be there so I say I'm looking for the old wise owl? And a voice form all the way a couple room back answers and calls to me so I follow it and inside that room its very dark and most of the colors I have seen so far from entering the room were browns and dark browns light browns like those of bronze and copper and color of old books and such makes you think of wisdom. The old owl is a statue and its brown as well so its a carved statue of an owl. I say this saying as if I knew it well but I didn't know it well but I said it anyway " Princess or Prince do I have one that is for me? " Or something like that... And the Owl says " That is not how it's said, I won't answer until it's said correctly. " And I don't know what it is like some kind of riddle or possibly a code or something but the bracelet knows the bracelet that has a woman like appearance to it. It tells me that it will possess my mouth and say the words for me correctly and it explains that the owl is old and wise and blind so he won't notice so she does so and I say the riddle correctly which was long and I can't remember how it goes but it goes somewhat like what I said before. But what I'm looking for the answer is basically is there a prince of my dreams out there for me? The owl shows me a book and replies saying ' Yes...And No. " Then it goes to show me a feather that has many words written on it and has a back and front side to it. He tells me this feather would decide for me and I had to search for it. He explains something about one side telling about one choice and the other telling about another. One being wrong the other being right and my soul had to make the choice. I told him have I Found this feather before? And he said I had already found it. So meaning the choice had already been made. And it seems my soul made the wrong choice.. The one that would end up without this person who I Loved very much so much that all I am filled with is regret. This person loved me as well but was disappointed my soul made the Wrong choice and so the next soul that had to make a choice was another girl and she made the right choice so she got the man who was yes divine and princely and beautiful in everway and it really hurt me inside thinking about it. The owl goes to tell me when I was very young and innocent a memory I can't remember I was taken to a white room where a man lied like a prince in a glass coffin or something like that and a book told of a story. About how this man would love you and only you and was made for you. In the story he was addressed as a prince. And then the lady asked a naive and young me if I had to marry this prince would I marry him? And I guess young me says I dont knooow and the lady asks If another prince came that was better then this prince would you marry him? And I guess what I said was like ' probably or yes ' or something like that but in such a childish way the lady looked sad to me and just said I understand and took me away and I guess for some reason I was to examine the next girl who came in and I did and the girl was little and she answered ' Yes! and Yes! ' to both questions and was very happy and child like as well the lady was happy for her and she looked at me and frowned while hugging the child and I guess that was the end of that vision of a memory that was actually deeply forgotten cause it was so painful to my soul after it knew the truth.. And according to the owl the truth was that there was no BETTER prince then the man in the glass coffin. He was the most perfect one out there for me. And there are probably others but no one better then him. And because I was selfish my child self was selfish and wanted something more or expected something more i guess it met my soul was selfish and because of that i couldn't have him and that perfect prince went on to another girl who's soul was not selfish and she got him and i dont know why it just left me with feelings of painful regret like no other. Also as if my punishment was to never have anyone as good as that prince so.. I could never have that and this other girl could and it seems it was like a one of a kind of chance for my soul or something I'm not sure if it was or wasn't but it felt like it was. But yeah the dream just ends with me being miserable and feelings of regret like I never ever felt in my hole life just weight down on me and I cried and cried and I said things like ' But I loved him so much.. I'm so sorry..." And for some reason when I woke up of course I was very sad but the thought of having made the wrong choice felt nostalgic to me like that hole memory of that white room and everything making a choice as a young soul or child and making the selfish choice it felt like...It felt nostalgic and I just came to terms with the fact.. I guess my soul is selfish.
stellarium stellarium
18-21, F
Nov 18, 2015