I Miss My Baby Boy

I had a miscarriage in July of 2006 when i was five weeks pregnant. I was elated to find out i was expecting again. My due date was September 30th 2008. Everything was going good until May 3rd when an ultrasound found no heartbeat. I was admitted into the hospital on Monday May 5th to induce labor. I was five months pregnant. Fifteen hours later I had our baby boy. We got to hold him and look at him and set up his burial.

I may sound crazy, but I have no living children and just the fact that I got to labor and deliver my little boy meant so much to me. Seeing him and holding him gave  me the closure I've been wanting since my first miscarriage. Even though it has been a long road, and still more to come, I am very greatful for the time I did have with my son.

I got to see him move on ultrasounds, hear his heartbeat and feel him move inside me and finally got to hold him in my arms. Even though he was not born alive, I am still greatful for having him

My heart goes out to all who have had a miscarriage. No matter when it happens, whether it's at two months or five, it is still an experience that will never compare to anything else.

A lot of people downplay miscarriages like it was not a real baby. I heard my son's heartbeat for the first time at five weeks. And for anyone to say that it wasn't a real baby is just insane. Don't let anyone downplay your pain. We have all lost children and it is a mother's worst nightmare. It's just a shame that we have all been through it. God bless!

babyj248 babyj248
7 Responses May 7, 2008

Im just back from the hospital.i delivered a baby boy in 5 n half months.born alive but expired within a few hours..i kept myself in control during the hospital stay but now i just can't seem to stop crying.i miss my baby so much.cant believe the fact that he is no more with us.i just can't bear the pain anymore.

Hi<br />
5 Aug 2010 I gave birth to the most precious baby boy. He was in hospital from birth because he was dependent on oxygen. At 3 weeks old I found out that he is a downs syndrome which was heart breaking. At 5 weeks old he was still in hospital but he was going for an operation so that we could take him home. 10 Sep 2010 my son passed away during surgery due to the anesthetic. My heart was crushed. Last week Tuesday I found out that I am 5 weeks pregnant and 2 days later I started bleeding. I had a miscarriage and it brought back all my neg thoughts and heartache.

i went for my 12 week scan last thursday only for me and my partner to be told we had lost our baby at 6 weeks but i was still carrying it, they sent me home for me to pass it naturally but on monday(my beautiful 12 year olds birthday) i started to lose our baby. had to be rushed to theatre to have d and c as was losing to much blood. I feel so blessed to have my 12 year old son and so sad that we lost our baby on his birthday. my sister and a few of my friends had miscarriages and i never ever realised it coulld feel like this. i would not wish it on anyone and it just makes you realise how precious ur children are. if anyone else is gong thro wot we are then i am thinking of you and i feel ur pain. xxxx

V159, how could people say that?! That's horrible. How could losing your child be for the best? People said that about my miscarriage too. I wish everyone all the best for your recovery. It's a terrible process.... some people never get over it, but it's true what they say -- time heals. xx

I lost my baby too... at 9.5 weeks. The few people I have told said it was for the best and I should get over it, but I will never get it out of my mind.<br />
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Good luck to you in concieving in the future. I know when you are able to hear your baby say i love you mommy, your heart is going to break in the best of ways...

Thank you for your story I just lost my baby at 16 weeks and reading that other woman have gone threw this helping me to understand my own feelings.

*hugs*<br />
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I was very nearly a miscarriage... it's odd to think about my possible non-existence.