Lost My Angel

I am 36 and found out I was pregnant March 24 with my first child. My husband and I were ecstatic! I went to the doctor on April 17th and heard my baby's heartbeat and received pictures. Everything was going great until Sunday. I started spotting, not heavily, but sure enough. Monday morning I was still spotting and put a call into my doctor. The "on call" doctor called me and just told me to monitor my urine. Throughout the day, I started cramping and having pain on my right sided ovary. I had heard that these pains could just be "growing pains" as the ligaments were starting to stretch to make room for the baby. But just yesterday, I called my physician and he told me to come in right away. We tried to hear the heartbeat, but could not. I was taken to the ultrasound room. I saw my baby up against the wall of my cervix, but heard no heartbeat. My doctor came in a few minutes later and informed me that I had lost our little angel. I am going to talk to my physician about the DandC procedure today.
My husband is a truck driver and is out of town. My family wants me to either go to their houses or come over to mine. They want me to talk to other people who have experienced what I have. I just want to be alone right now. I cannot quit crying, cannot sleep, cannot eat. I just want time to get over this on my own for a little while.
I do feel better now that I have typed this out. Thank you for letting me share my story.
Nicollei Nicollei
May 23, 2012