Agony

I am having another sigmoidoscopy on tuesday and I am terrified, I have severe rectal bleeding because of a hole in the lower bowel, I had a colonoscopy in jan and it was like being tortured alive, i have way past any embarrassment, last time I was given sedatives which meant  I was unaware of the procedure but this time despite sedatation i was totally awake,at one point my dr [who is lovely] was pushing the scope with all his might to get it round a 'difficult loop' and i felt it tear and because of bleeding he had to stop,I take morphine but the pain was unbearable i have been hospitalised because of bloodloss recently and know it needs doing but I am so scared.
poppyjoe poppyjoe
31-35, F
Jul 29, 2007