My Ex-boyfriend Started Stalking Me For A Bit

This is the story of what happened to me when I was 16 years old. My ex-boyfriend - let's call him Boyd - started engaging in stalker behavior after I broke up with him. I started dating him when I was 14 years old, going on 15. We were on and off for almost two years, and I broke up with him right when I turned 16, because I had met someone else. After I told him, he was devastated.

At first, Boyd was pretty quiet about the whole thing. He was just upset - crying, sobbing, the works. I just kept hanging up the phone when he'd call because I didn't know what else to do. He was always a bit.. unstable... so I had to limit my conversations with him out of fear of what he might resort to. Then, he started threatening me with suicide. That scared me, because he would always give me a vivid description of what I would see when I'd open my windows in the morning or at night. I just calmed him down, and explained to him that things are different now, and that won't scare me into getting back together with him.

Then he started threatening me with killing my dog. He would email, text or call me and tell me that he would come into my house and skin my poor dog alive... Yeah, it scared me the hell out of me. Do anything to me but please DO NOT hurt my animals! I didn't want to show him that he scared me, so I just told him to "**** off, get out of my life." Then he started telling me how he'd sneak into my house at night, cut my parents heads off and show them to me. It really spooked me! I already had night terrors and nightmares happening to me, and hearing more scary things would only increase them.

I stopped reading his messages, because I realized that he'd keep sending more and more sick messages when he saw that I reacted to them. That's when he started showing up places. I'd see him hiding behind an abandoned school near my house, where we once used to hang out. I'd see him in shopping malls, places that I would frequently visit. He lived about an hour away from me, and he didn't have a car so it wasn't easy for him to travel and it couldn't have been a mere coincidence. I also started seeing him around my high school. He's be lurking around where I'd be hanging out. I would try my best to ignore him, and when he tried talking to me, I would act like I didn't hear or see him, but it was getting to be too much. I told my mom, but she said unless I was willing to call the cops, there's nothing we could do, other than me not hanging around those places too much.

I started doing dumb **** to get him to leave me alone. I started openly talking to guys on facebook, just to show him that I have moved on and that I wasn't his anymore. This only infuriated him more! Instead of threatening me with family and animals, he would send me weird, pornographic/erotic messages, explaining what those guys would do to me in the bedroom. Only, it was never sexy things. He would describe disgusting scenes of those guys raping me with different devices and stuff. I had to delete the messages just in case my parents or step-sister saw them one day. I didn't want them to know how out of hand it was getting. I stopped answering his phone calls, yet sometimes he'd call and ********** into the phone for me to hear. It was really twisted. He would also reminisce in things that we used to do together, and try to remind me of all our "good times" (that were all bad memories for me). He would, additionally, begin to make up stories of how we used to have sex and where and stuff. He would email me, asking me to remember "that one time he ****ed me so hard, and I c*** everywhere.." He has the sickest image of the past, and it scared me that he enjoyed fantasies of things that never happened...

I started seeing another boy from my school, and we started foolishly having sex. I did it probably to free myself of Boyd, to be with someone else that wasn't a creepy stalker. When Boyd found out to this day, I have no idea how he found out), I was on my way home via streetcar. He called me and told me he was waiting for me outside my house. He told me that as soon as I came close to my house, he'd grab me and rape me so hard that I would forget about that other boy... I was deeply disturbed. Instead of going home, I walked around different neighborhoods for about two hours. My mother worked an hour and a half away from our house, and my step-dad was out of town that day, so I had nobody to turn to and ask for help. My mom took an early day off work and came home early, and that's when I finally came home, too. There was no sign of him anywhere, so I thought he may have been bluffing. Of course I came home to two or three messages about how he noticed I didn't come home. He thought that I went to that boy's house to "****". He started calling me a **** in his messages, and telling me that since I'm such a big ****, he'd pay me to have sex with him. He'd go on to describe what he would do to me as I'm laying on my bed and stuff, it was disgusting. I started ignoring all of his messages, all of his (and other blocked number) phone calls, and I started hanging out with friends after school for an hour or two just to not have to come home to him. Or I'd skip classes and go home extra early via taxi to avoid him.

I never really told people how badly it disturbed me, because it was embarrassing, and I didn't want people to think that I'm someones victim. I also didn't want people to think that I was exaggerating or lying, since we've had girls make false claims like that before, who were caught. But I'm sharing it now in hopes of telling you ladies, and gents to watch out for who you date!! If you know the person is weak, or has a delicate and often violent psyche, try and avoid them! Things can get a little messy when you decide that you want to move forward and they decide that they want to live, obsessed with the past.
Nataliina Nataliina
18-21, F
May 15, 2012