My Side Of Story

I believe we all have different sides of stories to our experiences and true feelings, whether it is moral or immoral. The experiences and feelings are real and authentic, but the impact of the acts are moral or immoral. It depends on how you look at it, who looks at it, and when looks at it.

For me, my summer was heart broken even though I had an affair with a married man because we fell apart. For his partner, it was heart broken as well if she had known it. For my partner, it was heart broken too if he had ever discovered it. However, nobody knew what was really going on between my partner and me and the married man and his partner. What motivated us to have an affair in the summer that led to all the involved persons having broken hearts? I wonder if people really care or they really want to hear.

For me, the people who have an affair with another person suffer the same amount of pain as the people whose partners betray them. Some people may not agree with it, but unfortunately it is the truth. True pain comes from experiencing true love; true love amplifies true pain.

hotyogabk hotyogabk
51-55, F
7 Responses Dec 5, 2012

Thank you for your kind comment and understanding.

Take care and have a great weekend,
Hotyoga

Thank you for your understanding and kind comment.

Have a great day and take care,
Hotyoga

a beautiful sentiment.

I've been on the side of being cheated, by my wife and out pastor.
And there was tones of pain. I'm sure she had her pain yes. But be real, hers was chosen. I know I wasn't the best husband in the world, and by no means am I perfect. But I'm sorry, there is a huge amount of pain when cheated on. Period. And was not chosen. You either love the one you marry, for better or worse. Or get the hell out of the marriage FIRST. It's not just the pain of losing the one you love, the one cheated on gets it 10 fold, because there is the del esteem issues, the burden, of what the hell did I do so wrong that you would spread your legs for someone else, yet stay in a marriage. It's BS.
Don't for one minute think the one cheated on didn't have the same feeling of " the grass is greener on the other side" but made the conscience decision to stay on this side with a few patches of green grass.

agree! life is always pain and pleasure together! appreciate if add me to share more experiences!

My grandma ' used to say, ain't nobody knows what's on the kettle, but the one that's brewing.
No one can truly know what's in someone else's heart. Yes we can generalize and say , because I feel like this you must feel like this, to all the commentators that have thrown stones, what do you know? If you have always lead such a moral straight line,how can you possibly know? And what are you doing here ,by the way?

Thank you for your understanding and support, and I do need it.

As exposing myself to this cyber space through writing my stories to grieve and heal, I do expect others to respect me and treat me the way they want to be treated. Thus, they don’t have to like me, nor do they like my acts, but they need to respect what I write without name calling or putting me down.

To be true, whoever they are they really don’t know me, neither do they know my life or my partner. They have no ideas about what I have been through in my relationship with my partner, so simply they are making comments projecting what they know about their own lives, not mine. In addition, I will always have my own dignity, no matter what!

When couples or spouses claim they have never had affairs in their marriage, I sometimes do wonder if it is because they don’t have the opportunity or they resist so strongly to extramarital affairs. According to Dr. Huizenga recent statistics suggest that 40% of women, increasingly high, and 60% of men at one point indulge in extramarital affairs. That said, if we put these numbers together 80% of the marriages will have one partner at one point involved in marital infidelity.

In sum, I do hope whoever used harsh words on me, they don’t experience the same level of pain and loss as I went through with my partner and a man who I fell briefly in love with.

Sorry, true love should not mean true pain will also be there.