Should I Have A Second Abortion?

i recently wote on here about my boyfriends addiction to gambling and its effecting my decision as to whether to keep our baby. i had an abortion 6 months ago when we had onlt just got together and it just wasn't the right time to be having a baby. i have 2 children already and my priority was them so i had the abortion. after i felt guilty and ended up on anti depressants.
i have now recently found out that i am preganant again and had every intention on keeping the baby. me and my partner even chose baby names. i have now found out that he has a severe addiction to gambling and debt because of it. he is willing to get help and is looking at loads of information to get over his addiction but due to the debt he has clocked up it will be effecting him financially for a while. this means that him moving in and also paying towards a baby is going to be near impossible.
i don't know if i can do it on my own and i am worried that i won't be able to look after my children the way they deserve. but i am also unsure as to whether i can go through another abortion. i don't want to end this life but i don't know if it is possible to keep the baby if i don't have the support network from my partner. he is going through so much trying to give up gambling and i'm trying to stick by him but i'm finding it hard. i just feel like i'm giving up an awful lot just to help him.
should i keep our baby? or is it just unfair on the child?
sianny sianny
4 Responses May 23, 2012

Dont know if this respond is too late or not. But i do believe in karma. Babies are new souls which have gone through many many lives as animal because of punishment for their previous lives. So they finnally has the chance to be human again. And if u take it from them, sure they will get very upset. And that is just very unfair. U will have a serious karma. But to make it less serious, pray and tell them how regret u do everyday. Wish for the best.

If you want, you can try going to a pregnancy resource center for help, as they offer free financial aid, adoption options, counseling, and counseling to post abortive women who are struggling. As for what the person mentioned above, I don't think foster care would be a problem, as that is mainly for people who have had their children taken away from them by the government. There is a large wait list for people to adopt kids, which is far better than foster care. Good luck to you.

So soon after your previous abortion I can't imagine your circumstances are too different. As you said, your priority is the 2 children you already have, and you need to think about what is going to give them the best chances. And may I also suggest a long-term form of birth control, like Mirena or Implanon.

I would love the option of birth control but due to a hormone imbalance and that has a hormone in it is a no go. I'm looking into the copper coil at the moment so hopefully that's something I can do. Thanks for your help

Paraguard is a copper IUD that contains no hormones and lasts for 5 years. Hormones are tricky, and birth control can be really harsh. My best friend went on the pill and became an awful beast.

By the way, someone mentioned adoption, and I'd like to say that studies have shown non-biological parents, so adoptive parents and foster parents, are 17 times more likely to commit a deadly assault against the child. I'm not saying all adoptive and foster parents are terrible, but the system is broken and people who can be good parents are shunned for people who look better on paper.

Have you considered carrying the baby till full term and give her up for abortion? Given that you have to take anti depressants for the first abortion, am concerned how a second abortion will affect you. If it affects you worse than the first, then how are you going to take care of your 2 kids? <br />
And from now till the birth of the baby, it's still 7-8 months, a lot can happen meanwhile. Maybe your bf can find a good job that enables him to pay off his debt ? <br />
Do consider carefully and discuss it moodier with your bf and maybe even your family. God bless

I would love to think I'm strong enough to give a child up for adoption and to give someone a chance they deserve but I am unsure as to whether I could let my baby go after carrying and bonding with them for 9 months. Thank u though, kind words help

You are most welcome sianny, I've been on the same position and hence understand how agonising it is to have to make a decision. Take care.

sorry for you but my choice would be to one get on the pill <br />
do not let the fool move in with you ever he is not ready to change and youhave your hands full with 2 kids already and number 3 on the way get a court order for support<br />
<br />
he is bad news

the pill is not an option for me due to health issues. staying with my bf is not the dilemma i have right now, i have time to decide what the future holds for us. right now i have a huge decision to make and i need a little support.