Im So Sorry Little One

I just had an abortion 3 days ago and its been the hardest thing ive ever had to do.the father was married and no I didn't know and he told me he would only of been a 2hr a month dad.I could of made it public but I didn't want his wife and child to pay when I should of been more careful who I slept with.I had the abortion because I know I cant afford to feed and raise a child completely alone nor could I start their life out as a lie not when i loved it already as much as I did. dud I make a mistake?I think either way I would of felt like I did.the only thing I can say is if I could go back a few days I would of never of taken that pill I wish to God I would of had more faith in myself and my ability to protect my baby from the life I know he or she would of had.God forgive me please.
feelsobad1 feelsobad1
26-30, F
2 Responses Sep 23, 2012

its been almost a month now and it hasn't got any easier I keep thinking I made the biggest mistake of my life and no matter what i do I cant take it back. everyday I think I lose another piece of myself. If I cant forgive myself how will God? everyday i look at the people around me that told me it was the right and only thing to do and I want to scream how could you how could I. I hope before anyone else out here does it please please think long and hard know if you have doubts you have them for a reason I am still pro choice I believe you have that right just be careful you can handle the aftermath. there are so many days I feel I cant and still I say im so sorry little one God forgive me so I can forgive myself.

I had my abortion yesterday, and it's by far the hardest and most emotional thing I've ever encountered. But I whole heartedly believe that everything in this life happens for a reason, and it could be a beautiful thing to come from something really really ******.. Because it is really ****** there's no other way to put it. Remember that no one gets pregnant to have an abortion and no one wants to make this horrible choice. But it's something as women that we have the right to do, we have the right to choose what we want with our bodies and with our lives. I grew up in a household where my parents didn't love each other and we struggled all the time and I swore that I would never have a baby until I was able to give it the best life possible, so don't think of yourself as anything less than a strong beautiful woman. You made the best decision for yourself and for your baby.. If you ever need help feel free to message me, I too am struggling with this so please remember that you aren't alone.