Closer And Closer

The closer I get to what would've been my due date, the harder it seems to be to get through the day. It would still be a little over a month from now, but as I watch people around me have their babies, and keep thinking "that should be me." I keep hoping things will be easier when my boyfriend comes home, 2 weeks left now. Having not been together for almost 5 months has not made this easy. And although it is just distance between us, it is hell to have to be apart and no be able o just cry with him or be in his arms when I need to be. And right now is one of those times. Last night it got to me that it would almost be time to have our baby girl. Instead of Christmas shopping we would be prepping for a baby. I laid in bed and it was all I could think of, and then I ended up dreaming about her again last night. It was awful and so painful that all I've wanted to do today is cry.
And to answer questions, yes I've thought about support groups and counseling. I pray and go to god for forgiveness. But sometimes I just have a tough day and need support from people who understand. From other women going through this, and from my baby's father who is 3000 miles away.
BB1006 BB1006
18-21, F
2 Responses Dec 8, 2012

It's absolutely normal for any human being to feel horrible after committing murder.

Thank you; we're all challenged by your unique point of view.

You'd be surprised. Especially when it comes to the infanticidal Christian pro-abortionist. Talk about an oxymoron, lol.

So you're saying I should have told her she committed murder when she killed her innocent baby ... nicely?

You are sorely mistaken for I neither have the authority to exculpate nor condemn.

Besides, since when is it wrong to speak the truth? When did Jesus every shy away from speaking the truth?

What exactly did I convict her of? What sentence did I impose on her? Was it life imprisonment?

So what would you call the premeditated killing of an innocent baby?

3 More Responses

I'm getting close to my due date too :( :( it gets me so emotional i know how your feeling :( feel free to talk if you need to