Help

I had an abortion at 9 weeks when i was 17, my partner was quite violent and often put me down i think about it all the time and feel jealous when I see people pregnant. My new partners ex is with someone new and having a baby and i feel obsessed to know how she's doing etc all the time. I want a baby so bad, i havnt been on contraception for a year now, i started taking the pill in November but after one week i stopped, i want a baby so bad! I pine for the one i aborted. My partner doesn't know im secretly hoping i will fall pregnant i am doing fertility tests every day to see when I am most fertile to have sex and hopefully coneive. I am very jealous that my partners ex is now pregnant after no birth control for the same amount of time as me and she had an abortion later than when I had mine so why is she pregnant and not me? Please help me :(
Ricketts91 Ricketts91
18-21, F
2 Responses Jan 7, 2013

Please don't rush it. You now have the opportunity to have a child when the time is right. Your child will always be in your heart. Having another can't replace the first, but at least if you do it when you are fully ready then you can give the second one a better life. I know exactly how you feel because I had an abortion and now I'm pregnant. I honestly wish I would have waited because I wanted one so bad I ended up having one by the wrong person. Keep your head up. Things will get better.

I wish you the best of luck and strength in finding your way. But I have to honestly admit I do not know how to help you. But the added P.S. below may help.

P.S. Before the entire discussion flares up about religion VS atheism VS people VS everything VS haters VS abortion. I just wanted to tell to the people commenting. Respect the individual, don't miss a perfectly good chance to $hut up or just help.