Not Sure Anymore...

Every single day since my medication abortion I've been feeling physically better, but emotionally it keeps getting worse. I know I made the right decision as far as what was best for my baby but I feel as though emotionally I'm handling it worse and worse. I took a life, which I was always taught was morally wrong. The only person who knows it was an abortion is my SO, everyone else has been told I miscarried. I'm receiving so much sympathy from everyone but it makes me feel worse. I feel like if they knew the truth they would hate me.
My significant other hasn't even talked to me since I got home and that's also making it worse. He said he would be my emotional crutch and that everything would be back to normal again. But he hasn't kept that promise. I feel so angry with myself and I wish I could take it all back.
I know it will get better with time but I feel empty. I also feel bad for being the one to say this has been a negative experience.
Geekgirl93 Geekgirl93
18-21, F
2 Responses Jan 23, 2013

Oh, how my heart breaks for you. Please know that you are never alone. Even though you may feel it you are not. I don't want to preach to you nor judge you so please don't misconstrue my message. I want you to know I am praying for you. For your heart to heal. For you to feel the love the Lord has for you. I am sorry that you are hurting.

Pray if if only to say " God please help me. "

I know there are many resouces out there that may be of help to you. Google or reseach support groups, or online forums that may be of some help and guidance for you. Look up PASS recovery steps.

You are in mourning. Allow yourself to mourn. Please reach out to someone you can trust so you don't have to be alone through this. I wish you love and healing.

No you not the only one, its a lot of wemen with post abortion syndrom PAS, you can type it in google and you can talk to somebody...