Really Need Support
Im 18. Found out I was pregnant on January 13. The test turned positive really quickly. I panicked and took two other tests that had the same result. My boyfriend and I pondered on what to do. I have two jobs and make minimum wage on both no way to support a baby on that salary. My boyfriend as well. We decided termination was the best. For one we couldint support are child with the needs required with low income. I made appointment for two weeks later. However during those two weeks I became so attatched to the baby inside me. I felt less alone. At work I would stop what I was doing and touch my stomach. My babygave me a lot of weird cravings so I would always be sure to feed mybaby whatever it was craving. My boyfriend would blow and kiss my stomach. Ive always wanted to be a mom. If I had the money I wouldve kept this baby. I had the medical abortion a week ago. I regret it. I wish I could have my baby back. Going in for my check up after the abortion was torture. Seeing pregnant woman carrying their babies inside them. I yearned for my baby back. I have the picture of the ultra sound of when I was just seven weeks. I keep it in my purse. I try and talk to my boyfriend about the aftermath of all this but he tells me not to talk about it. I cant not talk about my baby. I miss my child. I feel so horrible for what ive done. If I could take it back I would. I would give anything to have my child growing in my womb. Im such a bad person. I miss my baby. I hate myself.