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I Had An Abortion

I Had An Abortion.. And I Need Help Coping With The Pain.

By: An EP User
Written on February 13th, 2013
I recently just had an abortion. To be honest I'm only 16 I messed up and got pregant, the guy I was with I'm still with and now engaged to. My story is a little different. We tool the pregnancy test together and it came out positive. We were both so excited he started crying because he was so excited to be a father.( he is also 19 ). I absoulutly loved being pregnant but at the end of the day I had to face my parents. The problem was, i am adopted by my real dads parents. They took my 15 year old mom in when she was pregnant with me. Long story after that well before she found out me and and him had decided on an abortion do to my age and my family Etc. When she found out she pretty much disowned me and left me no choice but an abortion. I was not aloud to see him again, so I had no support. I found a way to talk to him. Now it's been a week after my abortion and I just can't believe what I have done. I loved that baby so much. And I feel so alone and scared. I have no one to talk to. I feel like the biggest piece of crap out there. I just want to die it hurts so bad! I'm only hanging on for my fiancé. But I don't know how much longer I can do that. I'm awake all night crying I try to sleep during the day but I just don't know what to do. And I can't leave my room so there's no " getting out " to take my mind off of things she won't get me the counseling. I just don't know what else to do. Please don't judge me I made a mistake I understand that but I really need help.
By: An EP User
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3 responses
  • Bentley1357
    Bentley1357

    Oh no! I am here if you need someone to talk to! It sucks that you didn't make the decision but you should look up something called the spirit baby. It's something that helped me get through my abortion. It's basically the idea that your babies spirit will come back to you if you ask it to. It comes back to you when you get pregnant again until it is born. The body may die but the soul doesn't! Your baby will come back to you don't worry hunny! Until then, hang in there your already a strong woman having gone through the procedure. Mine was awful. But just keep talking to your fiancé and maybe when you can legally move out y'all can be together again. I'm not sure the rules for your state but here you can move out when your 16. It's hard not having your family on your side and I'm not saying move out but do what makes you happy and keep your head high! Please know that it's not your fault and you can see your baby again one day! I had mine a year and a half ago and it's gets better everyday its hard in the beginning, but you will be fine in the end! Send me a message if you want to talk :) I wish you well

    Feb 15
    1 like
  • boekenhout
    boekenhout

    You had no other choice.You need to forgive yourself.Keep a journal as a means of dealing with your feelings.You are not alone.

    Feb 14
    3 likes
  • GeFe
    GeFe

    I know how you are feeling. It's difficult for me to help you because I feel those exact same things and I don't know how to escape them either. Some things are so much easier said than done. I wrote my story on here yesterday and its the first time in 5 years I've spoke in any way about it but after doing it I do feel better. Just know that you are not alone with what you are feeling, I'm coming to learn that there are a lot of people out there that feel the same way, many that have come out of it on the other side and learnt to forgive themselves. Your experience is still so new that it will break you heart but you are strong and you have your fiancé and I pray that one day you will be one of those people that can write on hear with advice for others on how you forgave yourself and how you brought happiness to your life again. Please take care of yourself and keep reaching out for the help that you need.

    Feb 13
    3 likes