I'd Just Turned 19....

I was starting my second year of college, my guy and I hadn't been together too long, and finding out I was pregnant was a punch in the gut.  Yes I wanted a family, but I was not in a position to raise a child, and at the time, I didn't have the confidence to say, I'm going to have this baby and give it up for adoption - that was something I couldn't begin to say to my family - and I think his parents would've wanted the child - and that's not the same thing as agency adoption.  I couldn't think of another option or a way out.  At the time it was the right thing for me.  

Did I struggle with the choice, not at the time, and even afterwards, it was still the right thing for me. 

Do I regret it now?  No, not at all.  Sure, I wish I had never been confronted with such a choice, that I'd been more careful and guarded with my body and in insisting on protection, but I made the choice and I stand by that choice to this day.  


nmb22311 nmb22311
31-35, F
4 Responses Jan 27, 2010

what puzzles me is the right wing exstremist that say you are evil for going through with the abortion and at the same time when a woman decides to keep the child, she is left alone trying to figure out what and how she can raise her newborn

I can relate to a similar situation myself...I had no second thought of having an abortion knowing I nor he could give the child the life he/she should have....And with great shame I could not even then nor now pathom adoption for selfish reasons....I HATE that about myself....Now that years have gone by I have seen family and friends unable to have a baby....I still would not re-do what I did...Though there is not a day that goes by that I do bot think about it....(10 years)....

We all make some hard choices in our lives and the worse thing is to start second guessing the choices we have made. We hope that we can make the right choices for our future. I'm in no place to judge and this isn't one of them. It took alot of courage to write this posting NMB and the courage to realize what you had to do at that time. I'm not putting down the choice you made nor do I condone it. To those who are struggling with this need to know that there is help out there, such as couseling, exstended family a friends. With all this there bottom line is you have to make that choice. I do know that couples who can't have children would love the opportunity to raise and love that child. My heart goes out to you NMB and I wish you the very best your future has to offer. Before anyone decides they need to judge some one on this subject, put yourself in there place, in the same situation. Support whatever decissions they make. The worse thing anyone could do is put them down for the hardest choices they had to make.

You chose. Fair play. Respect to you.