Post

I Want Revenge On Him!!! Please Help!

Please read my story that I posted the other day! Well, I found out through a mutual friend that my ex-married man went to his house and expressed that he was totally miserable with his life. That my ex didn't give him much details about why but that he needed a friend. Our mutual friend told me that maybe I should give him a call and so I did. After a 1 and 1/2 I finally spoke to him and I don't know if I feel better or worse. It was a nice conversation but he was EXTREMELY distant but appologized. I told him that I was sorry too for causing problems in his marriage, that I wanted him to leave his wife for me at that time. He said "well that wasn't gunna happen". That hurt so much after he said that but continued to have a civil conversation with him. I asked him why he seemed so distant/nervous and he told me that he was scared of getting caught again talking to me. That his wife still accuses him of having an affair with me but he keeps denying it and will keep doing so. Again, that hurt me. It ended pleasant, a goodbye closure type thing. I don't know what to think, it's almost like he never had feelings me. I feel used, stupid and dumb for calling him. I'm a complete idiot. I just can't believe after everything expressed to me during our affair that he could be so cold. It hurts so bad and I want revenge. I was thinking about writing an anonymous letter a few months from now telling his wife that he is just using her for her paycheck and that he has had an affair. God help me!!! I'm so hurt!!! Any advice and/or stories like mine. I just can't believe he never had any feelings for me. I'm really heart broken now! :(

smaddiemay72 smaddiemay72 31-35 11 Responses Oct 7, 2010

Your Response

Cancel

revenge is not going to make you feel any better. in fact you will feel remorse most likely at hurting this woman further. HE IS NOT WORTH IT. Your relationship with him was built on lies, otherwise he would have done the right thing and left his wife and started a real relationship with you. I understand some people like to swing and have many partners, all good if open and honest with all parties involved. He is a liar. Lied to you and to his wife, and possibly even more partners, sounds like a real catch. Sorry for your pain, you deserve better, move on and find a nice single option.

First of all he is the bastard in this situation. H's the lying cheating scum bag. Take it from someone who has been in both places...the one he was cheating with and the one who was cheated on. People cheat for many reason some is that they should never settle down because they like either getting it from a different ****/***** everyday or they have lost emotional intimacy from their mate. Either way being the mistress or the wife sucks because most cheaters never stop and all they are being is SELFISH and DESTRUCTIVE. Revenge is NEVER the answer unless it is the revenge of forgiveness because while they have moved on with their life you are left with the clean up.

The best revenge is to pull yourself back together and live a fabulous life! I know it doesn't seem that way now but moving on is healthiest for you and making your life better will not only benefit you but will also make him kick himself. Either way, don't let him back into your life.

revenge isn't going to make you feel any better TRUST ME

Wow Maddie....my heart goes out to you! No need for revenge, lick your wounds, hold your head high...take the high road. Move on onward and upward and don't look back!

I am a wife that this happened to. I would have appreciated a letter from the mistress. My husband isn't explaining to me "why" or "what" caused the affair. You may be able to give her some insight, share the personal stories he shared with you, tell her what he told you because all of that will help her decide if she wants to stay in it or not. Don't be vengeful towards the wife, come across as helping her see the light, and even if its not true, you need to apologize to her. You are a woman who slept with a married man, and you need to be aware of what a huge mistake that is. One day you too are going to get married, and i guarentee on that day you will be thinking of this man's wife. That she thought she would be his everything, and all he ever needed, but little did she know on the best day of her life that he would one day he would meet you and betrayher. Anyone can cheat, and it could happen to you, and you will see the devestating affects it can cause. Your job right now is to never talk to this man again, and if you can help his wife make a better choice for herself you may even save her a lot of heartache down the road. You know, hating someone is like wishing someone to die but you are the one drinking the poison. He had it all... he had you and his wife. You think a man who is willing to break a covenant with his wife cares about you right now? Create a boundary, block his number, let him know you don't want to be with someone who breaks promises to the most supposed important person in his life, his wife, and you will find someone who has better moral character than he does. Become a better person, learn from this horrible mistake, try to do something good, and MOVE ON.

I am so sorry, i keep trying to apologise an i mess up words. all women who have affairs arent the same, some of us believed lie after lie, even if it would have gone better on rippley believe it or not. i am so ******* sorry if i hurt another woman.

I am a wife that this happened to. I would have appreciated a letter from the mistress. My husband isn't explaining to me "why" or "what" caused the affair. You may be able to give her some insight, share the personal stories he shared with you, tell her what he told you because all of that will help her decide if she wants to stay in it or not. Don't be vengeful towards the wife, come across as helping her see the light, and even if its not true, you need to apologize to her. You are a woman who slept with a married man, and you need to be aware of what a huge mistake that is. One day you too are going to get married, and i guarentee on that day you will be thinking of this man's wife. That she thought she would be his everything, and all he ever needed, but little did she know on the best day of her life that he would one day he would meet you and betrayher. Anyone can cheat, and it could happen to you, and you will see the devestating affects it can cause. Your job right now is to never talk to this man again, and if you can help his wife make a better choice for herself you may even save her a lot of heartache down the road. You know, hating someone is like wishing someone to die but you are the one drinking the poison. He had it all... he had you and his wife. You think a man who is willing to break a covenant with his wife cares about you right now? Create a boundary, block his number, let him know you don't want to be with someone who breaks promises to the most supposed important person in his life, his wife, and you will find someone who has better moral character than he does. Become a better person, learn from this horrible mistake, try to do something good, and MOVE ON.

RIGHT! Why hurt his wife? You're in pain and want others to suffer too? He said those things as a defense mechanism. He was convincing himself that it WAS over. He is filled with guilt and shame. Be the bigger person, get on with your life. The hate you keep in your heart is poisoning YOU!

Why the revenge? Why would you want to take it out on his wife - she is the one who will be hurt not him. Think carefully before you act.

Do the right thing and get revenge on him. Write a letter to his wife saying what happened in the affair and she should end it anoymous though. And go round and tell her after you have posted the letter. Be strong and get what you want, take away his wife from him even if he says he loves her he ovbs doesnt if he had a affair. Then carry on with your life and I wish you the best.

That his wife knows and suffers every day should be all the revenge you need. You could not make him anymore miserable than he already is.