Getting Help

So I wrote about getting over my affair about 3 weeks ago and I'm still struggling.

I've finally decided to go get help with these obsessive thought patterns. I didn't think I needed help, until I talked about it with my friend and she told me her story about "being damaged." I wouldn't say that I'm damaged, but I do know that not a single day passes by where I don't think about him in some capacity or another. It is hard to see the issue while you are going through it, but I'm emotionally attached to this person who doesn't give a rat's *** about my feelings. I understand the reality of the situation that there is no way we will ever be together nor would we ever be a good fit. Every day gets a little bit better, but it still bothers me how he passes in my mind each day. I'm going to seek help to see if I can change this pattern.
Lollylin Lollylin
31-35, F
3 Responses May 7, 2012

I hope you get the help you need. Thinking about his everyday is not necessarily a bad thing, your human. You have to give it time, and in time you will think less of him, until eventually you won't. Give yourself time, don't punish yourself. You made your mistake, and are not trying to fix it, don't fixate on it so much anymore

Is there any chance your hsb would consider sharing you, openly. You'd be surprised how many hsb's do and since it looks like you're somewhat hooked on the idea and excitememt of great sex with other men who can bring what your hsb can't - it could be an option for you. Best part - it's not cheating and something that couples do together. I've been doing shared wives for years and although I can't explain it, it seems to work well for them.

NO way would he consider it, but I'll fantasize about it.

Too bad. I stumbled into shared wives yrs ago and have been doing them ever since. The cpls seem to enjoy it as a spice in most cases

you should apologize and as humble as possible crawl to his doorsteps on your knees and give back to him everything you shouldve been giving him. accept full responsibility.