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Confused

Well my marital story is no different than anyone else here. My husband and I are high school sweethearts, been married going on 18 years and we have more than grown apart. It started some years ago, over 10 to be exact. He has had more than one emotional affair, one that led me to kick him out of our home for 3-4 months some years back. He came back and promised to change. Although I haven't had any evidence of any other emotional relationships, I've never gotten over the past. He works with the women that were problems and I just have no trust in him. We obviously have other issues besides those that have torn us apart. I dread having sex with him, so for years that has been an issue as well. Finally this year after much soul searching, change and trying to make our marriage work I decided that I was going to focus on me and my needs. Make a long story short I ran an ad and started meeting men in the same situation as me on more than one occasion I thought I had a connection but it turned out to be about sex and nothing more. I'm still not happy, as I read these stories most of you have had real affairs with men that gave you what you needed. This journey isn't turning out that way for me. I just want to be happy but I just don't know how to make that happen.........
srchng4it srchng4it 36-40, F 2 Responses May 17, 2012

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Sounds like you want an emotional affair. You should find a gay guy to pal around with or something...seems like as soon as sex enters the picture you aint interested. Most men will need frosting on their cake, the cake just aint fun with out it.

Good luck with it. When you find it, it is fun and exciting. Regrettable, we men, especially the cheating kind are mostly looking for sex. Relationships are much harder to find.