1 month today since last email to MM, he still hasn't replied. I knew he wouldn't but the hope was still there, but that hope has diminished. He is still the first thing I think of when I wake up, the last I thing I think about when I go to sleep and he still enters my mind a hundred times a day. Don't know when that will change, but I long for that day. Still not knowing what was real or not is a struggle, but I truly believe that he did love me. I have tried to convince myself that be didn't, thinking it would make it easier somehow, but I can't. I know he is trying to get back home for his kids and I wish him the best with that, I really do. If she takes him back his life will be worse than it ever was before, but that is a choice the has made. I just want to move on so badly, I have learned though, this type of thing can't be rushed. I feel good though, I have not contacted him and that is a huge.
Suzanne1976 Suzanne1976
36-40, F
2 Responses Aug 21, 2014

The thought part takes a long time. I'm on 6 months and still think of her, though I don't want her back. My feelings are gone, but the thinking part still lingers. Give it more time and wish the best. I try to believe everything is exactly as it should be. The important thing is that you know you were loving. People who are loving, get loved. Not always from who they want, but from the best possible person for them.

I was way too loving in this situation apparently....thanks for your words

Well, if anyone is going to error in something, let it be by loving too much. I know I can be taken advantage of by somebody unappreciative of it. But, I believe loving another the way you want to be loved is how it finds you. Love attracts love.

It's hard to sit back and let things happen. Even harder when you feel that it might not end the way that person would like it too