Past couple of weeks I haven't cried but today is a different story. I've been climbing up that hill at a pace that I can maintain but today I miss him so much it almost cripples me. He wants to help me get to an emotionally stable place given everything we've gone through...but I'm having a real hard time accepting this support because I feel like it just prolongs the hurt so much more...I want him to help me but I don't want him to help me...I've had no contact with him for the past week and he's messaged few times but I have kept myself offline whatsapp...this is such a constant struggle....I want to be on top of the hill so I know I've made it...right now just crawling :(
unfinishedbusiness unfinishedbusiness
36-40, F
5 Responses Aug 22, 2014

It's been over 2 months now. I hope you are feeling better.

You to you is your most important relationship.
That you tear you between 2 men is madness.
You need to love you first, then you will take the right actions in life. These men will never give you the self love that is missing in you.
You are your happy KEY in life, it has nothing to do with what is happening on the outside and who you think that you are in love with.
You have many hurdles to get through. You make your bed then you have to lie in it.
Quote for you:
No one is free who has not obtained the empire of himself. No man is free who cannot command himself.”
― Pythagoras

Are you still married

I felt like I needed my aps support and that couldn't be further from the truth, your doing the right thing not talking! Whatsapp is such a burden to me even now, im still fighting the urge to go online and check if shes been on..should delete her number in theory but hey ho. I've had a bad day today too and I hope tomorrow is a better one for the both of us x

Thanks LionCaged. ...tomorrow is another day....sunrises and sunset...doing the right thing is such a hard thing to do...now I know how drug addicts feel coming down a high...no wonder they fall back into the cycle. ...wishing you a blissful day tomorrow.

Affairs require massive amounts of patience. The more you understand, instead of judge, the easier it is. Not easy, just easier. It sounds like you're giving yourself some "space" to process what you don't recognize yet. I find my best answers when I go where I feel lost - to the unknown - to my empty cup.

OnAlert you always say something that makes good sense.