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Im Fed Up With My Boyfriends Baby Mother

Hello all,  i am very new to new to this but im searching for a support group and advice from people with similar situations before I walk away from my sitaution. I have now been with my boyfriend for 10 months. when we first started dating i thought i had the perfect man, he was in the navy good famil well established and NO CHILDREN.. lol.. yet on our 3rd month of beingtogether he found out that a woman he had a one night romance with was pregnant, and she was keeping it,. i was shocked.. but i wasnt going to back away that quick i have a son who was 11 at the time so I thought it wouldbe fine a small little family i was ok with it. after finding out she was pregnant he finished his 6 yrs in the navy and was moving back home we suggested we move in together being in boston n his home is new york,, things could not have been better he moved here after about 7 months of dating.. however now at this time she was 7 months preg,, he never knew much abouther but she had her and was not sure it was his child it was a one night thing so he never denied the fact it could be his but he didnt accept it either, in no time she started her demands that he be there for the baby showe in fl where she lives and b present for the birth but i could not attend, which i accepted i made no big deal i had no interest in her but wanted to meet the baby. well because of her demands and he didnt go to either he was a man and told her until im sure im not gonna pretend its mine,. the baby was born in nove shortl after she started sending piks and saying she loved him and she looks just like him... which i still accepted i wasnt happy with the i love u'sbut i wanted him to handle it which he did ..he had a dna test done she was his... onceshe found out it was his the devil came out ,, emails texts phone calls ... all that i was not to bearoud the baby and that her baby shuld b number one to him not me ,i am aware im number 2 now i have a child i agree but she was just meanfor no resaon. finally we traveled to fl to see the baby and she actaully let me see her we went to her house saw the baby and i left my boyfriend with her to have time with them to discuss maybe some personal things i didnt need to b present for, i came back her and i talked had drinks, the minute we left and came home she found out i was pregnant she lost it he cant see his baby she hates me she has threatened my life she will murderd me dig me up murder me again, she wished death on mt bab she sd my boyfriend was a low lide a sucky father cause he did not give his daughter a family he started a family with someone else she has disrupted my whole relationship we argue over nasty things she says the fact he cant see the fact i cant see her and her threatenin and calling me going online puttin out my info im at a point where im loosing my mind my boyfriends sends support with no orderwe send clothes we do all we can yet she just calls late inthe nigh 2am and starts fights with me her and him ive since lost  my baby ive been so stressed put this woman is raringup my relationship.. my boyfrienddoesnot always tell me if she calls or what she says cause he thinks im going to get mad and leave him then i get pissed that he doesnt tell me im just lost im new and i dont understand why she would do this the baby is 3 monthsand he has seen her once whatdo we do how do i stop her from breaking us up,, mind u i dont hate her i believe she is very unstable maybe some postpartum going on she may want him she just had the baby but why is it my fault,.. why does she wanna ruin what i have

latoya29 latoya29 26-30 26 Responses Feb 21, 2011

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Im in a similar situation sort of. Ive been with my boyfriend for a year and 4 months. I take care of their child on the weekends and as of now through out the week because the baby mama just lost her mother unfortunatly. My boyfriend is a very sensitive guy don't get me wrong he has his not so sensitive times. There has been little arguments here and there between me and her.. my mistake for giving into her BUT I know better now. I was 15 when i got into this relationship and am now 16 so i'm pretty young but have the matturity of a 25 year old. Due to the loss of her mother she's going through a very rough time and she said he boyfriend isnt comforting her. What do I do when my boyfriend begins to try to comfort her.. I couldnt imagine losing my mother but is it necessarily right for them to "comfort" eachother? On another note shes veryyy flirtacious and even in front of me. My boyfriends tends to slip and start flirting back and even though its just flirting it eats away at me inside! I hate getting made to feel like i'm crazy but if something doesnt change i just might be. I never realized how much a "baby mama" effects the relationship. Need i mention she is partly dilusional due to starting a rumor that I slept with my ex because my boyfriend told her to pretty much stop getting around so much (when she was single). When she was pregnant she said her baby wasnt going to make it come to find out the baby was healthy the hole time and made my boyfriend think she was going to hemoridge bleed when she gave birth so started saying her "goodbyes and i love yous" incase it happend. The whole situation is messed up and theres to much to write but if anyone can truely relate to any of this please message me and respond with the best advice possible with or without experience

I defiantly can relate to this... Ok so my boyfriend is 24 and I'm 16 yes I know it's a massive age gap but I think I actually really love him, he's also my best friends brother which was awkward at first but now it's just normal. There's only one problem his baby mother.... Now at first me and her was alright with each other him and her have a 4 year old and they live quite close. He has her on Friday nights sometimes Saturdays. But ever since I've been with him which is 9 months now she's been very odd around him. She's never liked any of his ex's before but at the beginning she talked to me like a Friend. We have both noticed though that she's been very nice to him like too nice but because my boyfriend doesn't like arguments he ignores it. So it started the other day she messaged him for a favour but she called him "sweetie" and I'm not lying I was really pissed off with her. So I messaged her and guess what all her feelings came out about how she felt about me and about how no-one will ever love this guy more than she did and how I'm immature I was even though I'd done nothing to her but confront her about how she was talking to him. The only thing that's going on in my mind is, is she trying to annoy me or does she still have feelings for him? She always asked him for favours and to pick shopping up all the time and I'm getting pretty sick of it, I understand he's gonna be in her life because of their daughter but the way she acts is getting to me and I don't know how to handle the situation, she hates me and I hate her...

I had enough with my mans babymama drama 2, am taking off and walking away from it, Its going to hurt cuz I loved him and hes son but the drama is stressing me out and am only 22.. So I decided to get on greyhound bus on the 5 and leave back to Tx single Am better off that way.. I hope u can find ur strength one day to leave

He has to want to stop the drama, it can't come from you. Im going through a similar problem not to the extent of yours but its still baby mama drama. He is allowing the drama to happen because of a child that he doesn't get to see. You need to lay down some ground rules put an end to it or walk away

I didn't read any of the other responces because they were too long. I am sorry that you lost your baby. That is the worst part of this whole story. I'm not going through the same sitauiton, I do not know the situation with your babys father, and I don't know your prefrence on religion. What I would do in your situation is get a lawyer and get some kind of custody set up and press harrassment charges on his childs mother. She has no business calling and doing the things she is doing. I understand you getting upset about him not telling you the things she says, but I think he was right in not telling you. He was only thinking of whats best for you. It doesn't help you to know the things she was saying about you and honestly it doesn't matter. Again, I'm on your side! That is why I would tell her she can only call if its about the baby and if she doesn't listen, then press charges! She needs to know she doesn't hve controll and from what it sounds like, she thinks she does. I don't know your beliefs, but I am a believer in God and I say go to him for all your problems and worries. I hope this helps and good luck with your issue!! -Courtney

Iʻm so sorry to hear about your lost. Honey, you are a very strong woman! I am going through something similiar but your story takes a hold. I can see why woman who lost their man because of lack of confidence, ignorance, no ambitions, no goals or straight up no affection can make a woman go crazy. Now having a baby with a man and seeing the man grow into a brighter future can def spin a woman crazy too. But like Amber says, it only makes us stronger to see what affects a woman does to another. Your bfs ex sounds very manipulative and feels like what she is doing is right for her daughter. But women have the most strongest hormone reactives in the planet. We react ba<x>sed on our feelings, like an emotional amusement park. We have to come to the conclusion on, whats best for me! What makes me feel healthy in the inside out. Your man should be creating a strong foundation that minimizes the affects from his ex. He should put down and make his ex realize that what was once a one night stand is now being strictly caring for his daughter, not the mother. Woman sometimes always demand an emotional control/assurance from the father when they are a single mother. When there is hope to have the emotional assurance from the father, they will try every means neccessary to get it the assurance they need from them! Thatʻs why it is a challenge and worth learning path way when dating a person with a history of exʻs with children. It sometimes makes a person stronger or can shatter a person from the inside out. When you look at the Law of Attraction, what I would say should be attracting for you is LOVE. If you and your bf shows and embraces pure love for eachother, he will take ignitiative into having another pregnancy or better yet start a path way of MARRIAGE and continue living life as a wife and husband with a child from a previoius relationship. All in all it is what we attract that makes us stronger. Things like this happened for a reason, because you are the only woman strong enought that could handle such difficulties. Best luck to you!

I'm sorry you lost your baby.But there's 1 thing you need to do and that is make him handle his business.He has to deal with her because of his daughter and you have to step back.Plus,you have a kid with another man so you know what its like.Let him handle it and if he won't,move on.And as for her,ignore her as much as possible since you both have kids and you don't want to act like school girls ovr a man.Let your man handle it because he caused it.

I am so sorry for your loss and sorry that you have to deal with her. It is a lot of stress. You both are stuck between a rock and a hard place. It's very hard to have thick skin especially if this is happening everyday. Be there for eachother. If you love eachother and want to be together you will rise above this. I know easier said than done. I should practice what I preach since my baby's dad is a raging b****. They both were unfit parents. Drugs, partying, cheating ya know all the things you shouln't do when your married with kids. Well, at one point she told him she didn't want to be a mom and left for several weeks. She ended up going back but I'm not sure how long afterwards she took the girls away from him for a year. Not legally, she took it upon herself to do this. They were young so when she got remarried and had 2 more kids, she brainwashed them into thinking the he was their real dad. My boyfriend cleaned up and took her to court for visitation. The girls were 4 and 7 when he started seeing them again. But they are so screwed up from her they won't call him dad. She fights with him constantly telling him they have a better life with her and her husband he needs to stay out of theirs. She makes them feel bad or yells at them if they go against her. Its so heartbreaking to see this. My boyfriend and I have a 1 1/2 year old that loves her sisters so much she gets so excited when we pick them up. My bf's ex is so immature she will put her hatred above her daughters and use them against him. And sometimes she won't let him see them. The courts won't do anything to her no matter how many times he takes her to court. Nothing happens. She gets warned. That's it. She needs parenting classes or something. She will not see what she is doing to everyone. It's all about her. So frustrating we don't know what else to do.

Hi ladies, I'm in the same situation I have been with my man for 2yrs and his son is almost 4 The baby mumma is drama I'm talking stalking our details tried to fight him tells the child to say horrible things to me that I'm ugly or that his mum will tell us off my bf and her broke up when the child was 1 years old so I wasn't the cause of break up thank god he takes me very seriously and dosnt have anything to do with her I.e like staying at hers or talking as friends but she will not back off she wants him back big time she uses emotional blackmail and wants more contact with my bf and always turns up at family things with the child to make everyone feel sorry for her she constantly sends txts or calls to moan or be negative and has also threatend me I tried my best to be friends with her but she is to bitter she constantly bothers us and thinks she is the best mother in the world I have a good relationship with the child and often look after him, my advice is to stay strong as long as u know ur man is on ur side u are fine, we are thinking to seek a restraint order out if she continues as it disturbed my day as much as it does his as we live together..... 100 percent seek court or legal advice it is the only way to get peace x

My boyfriend's baby mama is so ghetto she used to stalk us and show up everywhere when he told her he was with someone else. So after physically assaulting over money her big *** finally went down to the child support office. They already put in the order and now we hired a lawyer to try and lower payments and for visitation. Now this crazy big girl is saying that I threatened her children (lmao) biggest lie in life. She is also saying that his daughter has panic attacks cause he moved to California from Florida(um hello your a stalker). I understand a child being sad and crying over their parent but panic attacks? That is a load of s***. I did not want to go to court and was planning to break up with him but now since she lied not so sure!

hey ladies I understand how you feel. My boyfriends baby mama really needs to get over herself. She calls both our phones talking stuff. She even knows ill tap that ***. She plays games with his daughter. He cant see his daughter unless he goes to her house. I feel uncomfortable everytime he goes to see his baby because she throws herself at him. I know she envies me and his relationship. We travel and do things they never did. I've learned to turn the other cheek when she calls. Laugh at her and tell he what ever helps you sleep better at night. Kill them hoes with kindness. Sometimes it takes for them to have another baby by someone else before they come around. Keep doing you. Trust nothing a ***** say, half of what he say and go with your own thoughts and feelings ladies!

She is jealous because she wants what you have. Nothing will irritate her more if you get close to her kid and form a bond! Moving forward with your life will irritate her. If you are happy with him, then she won't be happy. Show him that you are the better woman. Show her that you are the better woman! No matter how mad she makes you always stay calm! She wants a reaction from you! Don't let her get the satisfaction! Do you have a friend support group? Have your friends try and keep you calm and relaxed. Don't focus on her. If you always think about her, then she has won. She should rarely be in your thoughts. Focus on yourself, your boyfriend and your future family. Try and have another baby. Tell him your fears. Tell him you're affraid she will give you another miscarriage and ask that he not let her contact you or him except through email. Tell him you need to be relaxed and happy for your baby's sake. Ask him if you are his future? If he says yes, then tell him that you both need to focus on your relationship. He can still send his kid support, but if she continues to harrass you, then get a court order if you must. If you have proof that she caused your misscarriage than it shouldn't be a problem. Ask him to minimize contact until she can be civil, or until after your baby is born. Ask him to only talk about the kid, and if she tries to talk about "them together as a family" tell him to hang up. She will get the point. I know it's easier said than done, but I have a similar situation, only she lives 2 miles away. But we have actually got better. He has put his foot down many times. She still tries and tries. I have discovered that my happiness with him is what drives her crazy. If you know when she'll call, surprise him and take him out on a date during that time. He'll be so excited that he'll forget about her drama. Or make dinner and say... no interruptions. He can always call or email her later. Remind him that he also needs to focus on you... otherwise what is he doing with you? :)

Amber, I enjoy reading your comments they are straight forward and to the point. We are the better woman, there was a purpose for us to be in these childrens lives and step up to the plate. Because sometimes mothers donʻt do it!! Like i say, people come in your life for a season, reason and a lifetime. Everything is definetly happened for a reason and when baby mommas get all heated up, its because we are doing something right!! BABY MOMMA DRAMA = REAL HOES WITH PROBLEMS

She is jealous because she wants what you have. Nothing will irritate her more if you get close to her kid and form a bond! Moving forward with your life will irritate her. If you are happy with him, then she won't be happy. Show him that you are the better woman. Show her that you are the better woman! No matter how mad she makes you always stay calm! She wants a reaction from you! Don't let her get the satisfaction! Do you have a friend support group? Have your friends try and keep you calm and relaxed. Don't focus on her. If you always think about her, then she has won. She should rarely be in your thoughts. Focus on yourself, your boyfriend and your future family. Try and have another baby. Tell him your fears. Tell him you're affraid she will give you another miscarriage and ask that he not let her contact you or him except through email. Tell him you need to be relaxed and happy for your baby's sake. Ask him if you are his future? If he says yes, then tell him that you both need to focus on your relationship. He can still send his kid support, but if she continues to harrass you, then get a court order if you must. If you have proof that she caused your misscarriage than it shouldn't be a problem. Ask him to minimize contact until she can be civil, or until after your baby is born. Ask him to only talk about the kid, and if she tries to talk about "them together as a family" tell him to hang up. She will get the point. I know it's easier said than done, but I have a similar situation, only she lives 2 miles away. But we have actually got better. He has put his foot down many times. She still tries and tries. I have discovered that my happiness with him is what drives her crazy. If you know when she'll call, surprise him and take him out on a date during that time. He'll be so excited that he'll forget about her drama. Or make dinner and say... no interruptions. He can always call or email her later. Remind him that he also needs to focus on you... otherwise what is he doing with you? :)

I'm going through the same bs that most of you guys are going through & its getting old. I have been with this man for 4 1/2 yrs & for some reason she's still not over him, it makes me wonder why. His daughter is 4 & he stiill has to go to her house to see her. Ugghhh. He has also moved out once with her for two wks & came back. Then last year in may he got his own place & she still had to be there with her daughter. He moved back here in nov because he states he can't be without me. Don't get me wrong he is a good man but I cantt seem to deal with all this. She is crazy & young. Today he went to the zoo with them& said I had no reason to be mad. I don't trust them because they have slept together while we have been together. I don't know if I'm overreaCting or if I have a reason to wonder.... please help, what do I do?

Wow 4 years? Ok, this first part is for everyone. You need to establish ground rules right away. You need to make it clear what you will and will not put up with from your boyfriend and his ex. She will only try to get more from him. Eventually, whomever you are with will get the point and will try to make you happy. If you put up with it and then try to change things later, he will say, "but you were fine with it before". If that is the case. Tell him that it has always bothered you, and that if it doesn't change than there will be a huge issue. Pour your heart out to him and tell him how you feel. Do not yell at him, but explain it calmly. Ok, kourtney, this part is for you. You should not put up with him sleeping around with her. But if you are like me and really love this screw up, then this is what you need to know. If his daughter wants to see him than he should have his daughter come to you and your boyfriend's place. He should not have to go over there and should not be going on outings with her, this shows her that she still has a chance, and it shows you that he's putting her needs before yours. It should be you, him and his daughter. There is no need for him to go with her. Explain this to him. She is trying to get back together with him, this means that he is being manipulated and should not be in her house or going anywhere with him. Tell him that this is how women are... manipulative and sneaky. She's trying to cover it up and use her daughter which is a very selfish thing to do. Tell him if he wants, you two can take is daugher somewhere fun or have a movie night at your place. Form a strong bond with their daughter and you will really **** her off. Do this today. He needs to understand that you don't need to put up with this and that you won't anymore!

You are not over reacting. Sorry to burst your bubble but I have been though the same exact thing. In fact I stayed after he cheated with the mother of the child, and I allowed him to get back with me. I found out he slept with her multiple times for years which I found out later. Think this way you let a man disrespect you he will do it again, because you allowed it the first time. Just like if a man beats you today, he will almost always do it again. If he treats you like crap before you are married, he'll keep doing it after you walk down the (a)isle. If he cheats on you now, he's probably going to keep doing it. If he is not taking care of his kids when he meet you, he's probably not going to take care of yours. You are blind by love, there are many men out there who will respect you and never look at another women or ever touch another woman. he disrespected the mother by using her as an object of desire and he screwed you over at the same damn time. Do you want to live the rest of your life involved with a man who cheated on you and deal with the woman who cheated with him? Think again. Or you can learn the hard way like I did and waste your precious time.

I'm a similar situation too my man and me where married got a divorce and remainied platonic friends ....staying in communication and such well he gets a random chick pregnant and whatever she's decides to keep it to his surprise and mine well everything was everything until we decided to share our decision to reunite and then she shows jealousy all ect I hate her and she had the. Nerve to pretend to wana be cordial why I don't like her she should had never gone on the Internet and friends saying things she did she tells my we can move forward oh no why I will not forget what she wrote I don't have a problem with the child but I don't like her and when I here get Skype I want to cringe is it wrong I want her to go away so me and mines can be a fAmily because I'm expecting and I would really like his child our child to live in the same house this may be a bit rash but I'm being real I'm a Taurus and that's all I know to be....#texasgal

Omg ok I hate my baby daddy and his new wife! I gave 12 years and 3 kids who he hasn't seen or spoken to in 3 years n they always cause drama for me....lol.... Then I met my new boyfriend who doesn't get to see or talk to his kids cause she doesn't like me! I can only put it like this no one has to be in a relationship to be a parent we have to learn that something's just end up the way they end up! I did crazy **** he did crazy **** and our kids suffered n now that I have seen my boyfriends side of what's going on I try really hard not to hold the kids against my baby daddy and I try to encourage my boyfriend to try more n step back! Our children only know what we teach them 20 years from now I hope not to see my daughters or son posting a blog about what shoulda coulda woulda but instead just doing the next right thing! Nothing happens in gods world by mistake!

I'm dealing with the same thing, except he's my husband. His sons mom acts the same way. Their son is 4 though. We'll she is a really horrible mother, she neglects her son, lets her new BF hit him & hurt him, & always walks around saying how bad of a father my husband is. Then when my stepson goes home, she fills his head with lies & absurd things, making him not want to come to our house. & the last weekend he was here, he told me, "My mommy's gonna kill you." I was told to get a restraining order against her. But I think she's all talk, plus I have it on police record now. <br />
But you guys really need to go to court & he needs to get some custody over his child & you need to get a court order before you send any more child support, because even thought my husband was giving money to his ex & buying things for his son, she still took him to court & the amount went clear back to the moment he moved out. So it started out that he owed like 1400.00 $ & none of it goes to his son. <br />
And I recommended you document everything. What she say & when it happened. If she threatens you any more, get a police report.<br />
I also have 2 kids from a previous relationship, he didn't/doesn't want anything to do with them. & honestly I am so freaking happy with that. I don't even get child support. I have my kids, & that's all that I want. & my husband is going to adopt them, I want it done soon before he finds someone who tries to push him into their life. <br />
<br />
But isn't it funny how a lot of movies are always about the evil step mother. I'm beginning to think it should be the other way around, lol.

Damn right it should be the other way around! There is a reason that the guys leave the baby mama! And find someone else like us! Because we are the better person!

That is so true! Then they start bad mouthing them because they were not into them. typical losers is what i call it. they just gotta learn to grow up and live with it! Or sort themselves out otherwise the next partner they'll get will leave them.

Im dealing with my bf's babymoma too..This woman i wish would hang herself..she lives off welfare and does nothing to support her 2 kids my bf who ive been with for 3 yrs now does everything for the kids she wont even wash their clothes she is in an out of jail all the time she is worthless..one time i had to go to court and get custody of the kids cause she was in jail and her bf that had her kids had a price on his head and she wouldnt let my bf (the dad) have them cause of me..so i had to take it to court for their safety ever since then she has hated me and wants to fight me you know the usual childish acts of a immature so called woman..ive since givn her kids back to her when she got out of jail..i dont want her kids i love them but i dont want to take them from her i have my own..but she is always calling me a ***** and saying when she see's me she is going to beat me up..i just wonder if she was to run up on me & try to fight me for saving her kids life & keeping them out of states custody if i shot her dumbass would i go to jail ccause it was clearly be self defence what do yall think? im to old to be fighting i have kids to raise she is project trash and im very classy but i am packing ;)

im im some what in the same position. my boyfriend and i have been together for a little over a year now. he has a daughter with his ex girlfriend...she is 2 years the ex girlfriend repeatedly calls and texts him saying he is a piece of crap making him feel like a bad father....he says he hates her sometimes she will text him and he doesnt tell me or says what she said.... i find that shady! so when i bring her up in a conversation why does he defend her if he tells me over and over that he hates her?

Omg.. its nice to know that i am not he only woman who has to deal with my boyfriends baby mama drama!... ugh sucks *** all our lives we wait to find love and finally when we get it, it comes with baggage... i am sorry to put it that way but i am so stressed out my my bfs baby mama, she continuously tries to make him feel gulity about not being a family and how there son is gonna be 3 and he needs his parents and a family its so f**** annoying! my bf has a soft spot for her because she is the mother of his child and like someone here said he always feels the need to be nice to her to maintain peace, whats sad is when me and him broke up he even tried to work things out with her for the sake of the child but he didnt feel anything like that with her, and came back to me saying with her its not the same they only share a bond for the kid and its not love on a romantic level... but of course now that she knows we are back togather she tells him how she will do whatever it takes to make it work and blah blah... she knows i am in his life and i dont know what shes doing but he thinks feeling bad for her especially since she recently told him "O i know you love her, its ok you should try to work it out with her" now my bf feels sorry for her and he said he is confused and ugh... i am just hurting so much my boyfriend is so amazing to me and treats me really well but whenever hes minds getting confused and she does something he gets all weird with me and doesnt txt or talk and pretty much distances himself from me, He told me hes in a dilema he loves me but he also feels for his son and he knows how it feels growing up without a dad because hes been there, How do i make him understand if he tried it with her and it didnt work then it just wont... and if theres no love then whats the point?! god help me please... i feel like shes playing all the right cards... i dont know what to do...

awww i know the feeling babe it o.k just keep your head up what she is doing is called a distraction and a attention seeker sounds to me she is thinking about herself and not whats best for her child sounds a tad like an unfit mother if she is abusing the father and also his partner (you) but if he wants you and you want him i suggest you listen to that and keep it in your heart because if you start too doubt that and dont think the worste otherwise its goin too happen and youll lose him so just be strong for yourself and the relationship that your in and youll be alryt and i know its really hard to keep a good smile on for the baby and his/hers mother and i know that it herts and just tell him how you feel so your not bottling up all theese emotions bkoz thats the worste thing too do and thats what i did bottled it up and it wasnt healthy but in regards too that i mean just dont let her get to you and be there for your partner ask him how he feels and if he is alright even if he pushes you away it means they really want you there just doesnt want you too get hurt in the proceedure.. :) your doing the right thing you know

awww i know the feeling babe it o.k just keep your head up what she is doing is called a distraction and a attention seeker sounds to me she is thinking about herself and not whats best for her child sounds a tad like an unfit mother if she is abusing the father and also his partner (you) but if he wants you and you want him i suggest you listen to that and keep it in your heart because if you start too doubt that and dont think the worste otherwise its goin too happen and youll lose him so just be strong for yourself and the relationship that your in and youll be alryt and i know its really hard to keep a good smile on for the baby and his/hers mother and i know that it herts and just tell him how you feel so your not bottling up all theese emotions bkoz thats the worste thing too do and thats what i did bottled it up and it wasnt healthy but in regards too that i mean just dont let her get to you and be there for your partner ask him how he feels and if he is alright even if he pushes you away it means they really want you there just doesnt want you too get hurt in the proceedure.. :) your doing the right thing you know

You are so big for saying that you don't hate her...cause if someone caused me that much stress to lose a baby, I would put money out for their head. Don't let that trick ruin the great life you have...she's just one sad, loney hoe.

I LOATHE my boyfriends ex...I think she is a worthless piece of skin that abandoned both him and his then 4 year old son (her son). I fear that if she ever tried to come back that he would take her, he says he would not, but he started dating her when she was 15 and he was 36....yes I know, this alone should be an alarm to me. He is very protective of her and won't let me say a word agaist her without defending her. They were both on meth together and has had some seriously wild sex with other women and men together, while our life is quite vanilla. I am very conservative, I have never had a ********* or even tried meth. I have a feeling that I will never measure up in his eyes, and had she never left they would still be together. Tonight I had a miscarriage and I had to listen to the son (now six) praise his momma saying he wanted to live with her when he grows up (cuz the boyfriend won't tell him that his mama abandonded him) and I am bleeding and feeling depressed as it was, and you know what? That mofo had the audacity to defend her yet again as his unborn child was leaking out of me. I don't know who I hate more, her, him or me.

I completely understand how you are feeling. I am somewhat in the same boat as my boyfriend (of 4 years) continues to have drama with his baby's mom. It's upsetting to hear him talk to her all nice and pretty much kisses her *** just to keep the peace with her. Anything she does will affect his day and how he is towards me. It's been 4 fours since I've been with him and til this day, I'm still questioning if I can deal with it.

I understand your frustration. I do not know how to deal with my boyfriend's baby momma continually calling and texting for no reason pertaining to the children. Just to fight or call me a b**ch. I understand that there is a level of hurting, that they have a child and the father is not with them, however when do they decide to let them go, and live a normal life of their own. I'm continually frustrated by her we can not go out together without her on his phone the whole time. We went out of town once and she called constantly stating that the kids were sick or I think one of them even fell and hurt themselves. This was all to upset him, and it worked so as a conciquence our trip was essentially ruined. I hope that by joining this group that we can work together and overcome our frustration, and not let them get to us(like I have been doing) and enjoy our relationships once again.

she is just jealous. she wish she had what you have. do not let this girl not a woman come between you and your man.