She Said She Was Just "being Respectful"

My husband and I have been married for a little under 4 months, and have been together for nearly 4 years. I knew that he had 2 daughters, ages 12 and 13,  from a previous relationship (one that he raised but is not biologically his), and walking into a marriage with him, I accepted this. I had no idea what I was walking into. My husband and his ex split up almost 10 years . Over 5 years ago, my husband moved away from his ex and children to live closer to his family. Commuting back and forth requires several plane trips and almost 24 hours of flying, making visitation financial impossible for both parties. He left for training for the military last weekend, which took place at an air force base in the neighboring state where his kids live. It is his biological daughter's birthday today and she asked her mom if she could drive about 8 hours to where her dad is to visit him. My husband was ecstatic to hear that baby mamma was actually willing to do this for them. The plan was that baby mamma was going to road trip with her husband, daughter, and another child from her current relationship. Just days before the road trip a lot of things changed. I get a call from her (at 5:30am my time), asking if it would be ok if HER AND MY HUSBAND shared a hotel room to split the costs, because he can't have any visitors while he's staying on base and it would only be herself and the daughter traveling out there. She stated nothing would happen because she will get a room with 2 beds. Through out the entire conversation, I was still trying to wake up and understand how another married woman could justify sharing a hotel room with a married man, even if there would be a child in between them. She just kept repeating "i'm asking you first, because i'm respectful like that."  I called my husband immediately and told him of the early morning phone call, and he had no idea of this plan, still assuming the whole family would be there. Also, he never confirmed he would be staying overnight because the base he is at has strict curfew rules and he has to report both sat and sun that weekend. To make matters worse, baby mamma told him I said it was ok! Even though I clearly stated it was NOT OK! He later told baby mamma that as a married couple, we have decided that the request was inappropriate. However, when he arrived at the hotel to visit his daughter, baby mamma still got a room with TWO BEDS because she thought he still hasn't made up his mind about staying over. Where does this woman get the notion that what she is trying to do is not ok! To put things into perspective, when my husband apologized to his 12 year old daughter for not being able to stay over, she said "its ok daddy, you're married now." His 12 year old daughter is smarter than this dumb b*tch of a baby mamma! Has any one else have to deal with crazy baby mamas like this??
knaurelius knaurelius
22-25, F
4 Responses Aug 6, 2011

Wow i am so greatful for this sight. My boyfriends bm did something very similar ut not as drastic as this. First, isnt this woman married? It's very sneaky and selfish and her bad intentions are clear as day! Yes Take A Bow!

Bravo for not driving up and going bonkers! We should pop a bottle of bubbly in your honor... wow what a rare breed she is!

thanks for the comment! its good to know i'm not alone in all of this. :)

My boyfriends baby mama has done similar things in the past, though she never asked me for permission before hand, lol. It's extremely ignorant of her to assume that something like that would even be taken into consideration. <br />
I'd say just ignore her, she really has no bounds.