Just Move On Already

I get no one ever invisions themself being a single parent but the perfect families we see on television are not always our realities! I get this and most other people in the world do too but for some reason my boyfriend's baby mama and other baby mamas as well seem to not be able to get it through their thick skulls. Life isnt always easy and I could not even imagine how hard it must be on her to have to raise her baby girl without her dad being around but this is a prime example of why kids should not have kids! It is hard enough for adults and married couples to parent a child! But being bitter that you are no longer in a relationship with the father of your child is extremely POINTLESS! It is the biggest waste of both TIME AND ENERGY! TIME and ENERGY that should be put into that beautiful baby girl! I sympathize with the baby mama because I could only imagine how difficult it is for her but I just wish she could also see how I probably feel. I try not to make it about me because for me the most important thing is the baby! She did not ask to be brought into this world into this situation and none of us should short her because of the situation! She deserves the best from all of us if we plan to be apart of her life! I havent even met the baby and I understand if I dont get to meet her or be around her anytime soon! But she is still a priority to me and whatever she needs if her mom or my boyfriend cannot provide it I would try my best too! Now the baby mama knows this but the only thing she can think of is that Im with the father of her child and she is NOT! She constantly calls when she knows that he is with me! When she calls so baby girl can talk to her dad Im fine! I love when he gets to talk to his daughter but when she calls just to talk to him or argue with him then I feel somewhat awkward! I feel like there needs to be a boundary for their conversations! I know that she will always be apart of his life and I can deal with that but when he is with me and he has to talk to her about things that should no longer be her concern or his then I get confused on what I should do! I feel as though it is not my place to complain about it but at the same time when your boyfriend is on the phone with another girl, baby mama or not for more than 20 minutes having a conversation that does not pertain to the child it does cause you to wonder and now that I know she will be out here in a month I am starting to worry! I've never been 100% sure that he wouldnt leave me for her but he tries to assure me that he wont but I keep the possibility in the back of my head so that I am not disappointed! I plan on talking to him about it to just let him know that if after he sees her if he decides he does want to get back with her I understand because I dont want to be the reason he doesnt put his family back together! But just had to get some of this out! :/
mrams19 mrams19
2 Responses May 11, 2012

OMG! i know how you feel! i'm exactly in the same situation.. the best thing is that you talk to him and you tell him how you feel and as his gf he should give you your place and make it clear with her that they are NOT friend he is now just the Father and not there to hear her problems or whatever that they should only talk about their daughter's needs and thats it.. and they him to get in your shoes how would he feel if you were doing the same thing to him how will he feel?<br />
and well its all on him.. good luck!<br />
and remember if he is with you and NOT her is for a reason.

My book She'll always be his baby momma" will be out in the next month! I definitely can relate to the moving on issue and i also talk about that in the book! Will announce when it is available on Amazon.com and Barnes and noble.co