Endless & Unnecessary
So here it goes.. I found my first love
when I was 16. I was a soon to be junior in high school and he was becoming a senior. We were young, wild, and completely smitten with each other. We had our silly fights & breakups, but what kids dont? We had a good 3 1/2 years until things got a tad too rocky & we decided seperate ways were what we needed. I was the first to have someone new in my life that January, but NOTHING remotely close to serious, we never even officially dated. For my ex, it wasnt the same situation. He made his new relationship official within the 3 following weeks of our breakup & was telling her he loved her within a month. Before Valentine's Day even came, my ex & i were already communicating again. (His gf had no idea) we talked further & further and got so wrapped up in what we once had that we decided we couldnt let go. Spring came & she finds out she is pregnant after he has broken up with her. This girl & I even took a ride to try and settle our differences.. Little did i know at the time it was just a waste on her part. I could have been civil if she hadnt went back saying i said things that to this day i swear werent said. When it comes delivery time in October, he goes to greet his new baby & never comes back. He left me believing that i would see him when it was all over, but that waant the case. I let him be.. To let him have a fair shot at trying to have a family with his child and thw childs mother. Still though we were neither happy and started communicating again and were back together when the baby was anout 3 months. I love him more than i love myself and want nothing more than to wake up to him every day for the rest of my life, i know he feels the same. He says it breaks his heart how we turned out but that we'd spend forever working at it every day. His babys mother is extremely bitter & hateful, i have been no saint myself having to put up with her bs. I love this baby bc he is a part of the one man i want my forever with & would never bring any harm to him. The babys mother is now trying to leep me away from him through the courts and im terrified that she will succeed. I could do unspeakable things to her out of hatred.. But i love her child reguardless and want him in my life. I am now 21, my love 22.. Here we are considering marriage and other big plans, i would just like to hear from anyone who has seen or been in this situation. Losing this man would be the death of me, i dont want to consider if maybe leaving him would be best for us all, he is mine & i am his. Its always been that way, i will only share him with his baby... But i know the mother wants him and it eats her alive that he goes to bed with ME every night.