Some Tips For My Fellow Commuters....

This is for the people I commute with daily, or at least about 80% of them.....


1) For ****'s sake!?! Why would you use the turn signal AFTER you have slammed on your brakes and moved into the turn lane? The turn signal is to warn people behind, and in front of you that you're about to make a turn, and for those of us behind you we generally figure that will include the application of your brakes shortly so we might want to start slowing ourselves. If you don't use the turn signal until you're half way through a turn it sorta defeats the purpose don't it?


2) At least the idiots in #1 know they have a turn signal. Apparently  they're ahead of 80% of the rest of you!


3) Look behind me before you slam that accelerator to the floor and burn rubber to get out in front of me. About 50% of the time there's not a vehicle behind me for a f*cking mile! That's right! You wasted all that gas, a chunk of rubber off your tire and at least a handful of my heartbeats just so you could get out in traffic three seconds earlier.


4) I see Kitten already covered this one, but it's worth repeating. Please apply your makeup BEFORE you get in the car or AFTER you arrive at your destination. There's no f*cking way to drive safely while you're looking in a vanity mirror! And at best if I have to honk at you to get you to notice that green light then you're just ******* me off, and If you're not drop-dead gorgeous expect to get the biker's salute from me!! Oh hell, even if you are.


5) And those of you with cell phones read #4. You might as well put on makeup too, because you drive just as badly as someone who is. If that call is so important that it's worth risking my life over then pull the **** over to talk!!

6) That turn lane in the middle of the city street is NOT a f*cking on-ramp! That's right, it wasn't put there so you can pull into it, accelerate to twice the legal speed limit and dart into moving traffic! Surprise, surprise! It's for folks EXITING traffic to make a left turn. If you do use it to enter traffic then the correct procedure is to enter that turn lane and come to a stop while waiting to enter traffic.


7) Safe following distance is four seconds...As the motorcycle in front of you passes an object start counting and if by the time you get to that same object you're at a count less than four then you're TOO F*CKING CLOSE! I'm on a bike and if you're dumb *** is following too close and you look down to answer that cell phone ringing in your lap at the same time I have to brake hard then I don't want to end up as a greasy spot on your front grill. Yeah, I know some idiot will pull into that space if you leave that much distance between us, but at least me, or my loved ones, will be suing their dumb *** and not yours when that vehicle plows over me!

iRant iRant
51-55, M
2 Responses Feb 18, 2010

lol i love #1! sooo true!

Not New Jersey, but the state does have a "New" in it. Maybe that's the common denominator?