Frustrating Life Of The Partime Stepmom

I'm a stepmom of 2 girls. Well i met my husband 7 years ago we became really close friends at first he had a 1 year old and his ex was pregnant with another baby but they had separated already. 1 year after we were friends we started dating she found out he was dating someone and tried to make a living hell out of our lifes she did anything you can imagine to brake our relationship. so much that i decided to ended and talk him into getting back with her for their kids well he never did she had always been a sicko so we started dating again something i really think i should of nevr done again :( but i was so in love with him well we dated for 2 years and decided to get maried the following yea. his ex and daughters moved like 2 hours away from where my husband lived so he would pick them every friday and take them back every sunday we went to drop them off and she was no where to be found he then received an unexpected call from her saying she could not handle the girls and he needed to keep them for a while, So by then the girls where one 2 and the other 10 months old. my husband lived with his mother and they kept the girls since we were getting married the following year we talked about fighting their custody bringing the girls to live with us. (which never happened) 5 months before our wedding i came out pregnant which we should of been more careful of but it happend. and his mother my motherinlaw insisted it would be to much for me to take care of the girls while being pregnant and decided to keep them with her which was the worst thing my husband could of done. well we got married and well of course moved in together my mother inlaw would call my husband every single day for this or that involving the girls which i didnt say anything for a good was when my own daughter was born that all the conflicts began, my husband would go to work at 5 am and come out at 5 pm and would head to his mothers house to visit his daughter and would come home until like 8 pm every single day i got fed up with it and told him he couldnt do that any more he had me and our daughter to spend time with too so he decided to go to visit his daughters every other day which he does end this faster we have a 4 year old daughter and a 1 1/2 year old son of our marriage has never been normal and i'am so tired of only having a partime husband and partime father for my kids my husband..and my relationshop with my inlaws has never been so good for the same reason, he started bringing his daughters over to our place everyother day but to make matters worst his daughter were so spoiled the whole time for all they been thru my inlaws did anyhting they asked for to keep them happy they are even overwight because they were always allowed to eat only what ehy wanted so you can imagine how bad they were. i'm a full time stay at home mom so their where other rules and manners in my house so their was always conflicts between my husband and i about how his daughters reacted to what i would say in a bad he stoped bringing them so often. but any time i'm around his fam and the girls i feel i'm being watch to see what i say or dont say to his girl to see how i act around them my life is so frustrating i hate being a stopmother because i was never given the right of becoming a real stepmom i'm wondering if their is anyone out their who has been thru something like this or can give me advice of what to do.
corybry corybry
2 Responses Jul 25, 2010

My wife of a little over a year just moved out because I didn't support her in our marriage as a stepmom. I pray your relationship gets stronger and you all get happier.

I completely understand. They say being a mom is the hardest job no being a STEPMOM is harder. My situation is a little different from yours but the end result is the same, I hate being a stepmom.