I Feel Like S****

What can I say love suxs big time.

My story is just one of those type of stories that should have never happened.

Everything started on Fourth of July when I thought I had met the perfect guy. I had just gotten over a relationship when I met him. Everything happened too fast, I had just planned to date this guy for the rest of the summer and than dump him....Yea, didn't happen like I thought it would. All our problems started when people started giving me crap that he had a kid. Guess what later on I found out it was true. Instead of dumping him I stayed at his side and told him I loved him first time ever..... He told me how she had been his girlfriend since he was 15 and than she got pregnant and all she wanted was his money and than sometimes he said it was religious things that separated them and one time he said it was the parents.... Yea one of those stories got to be real or none of them at all. Guess what I also found out he was in jail one time... Yea not the kinda guy I want to be with right. After finding all this out I never left his side EVER .... You know he made me promise him that I would always be by his side no matter what. He even told me I was the girl of his dreams and blah blah. (you know all that crap guys say that is very sweet.) At the end I was so in love with him, but you know all of a sudden he just disappeared left me when I needed him the most. I still love him....... Sometimes I ask myself what has become of him? Or have I ever crossed his mind? Does he ever miss me? Did he actually love me the way he said? Should I go look for him so he can give me an explanation? Am I ever going to see him ever again? If he ever comes back should I give him a second chance?

I've cried for him like i've never cried for anyone his the only guy that took the time to know me and he tried understanding me.... Two days ago I found out something that crushed my heart even more.. HIS MARRIED!! Yea thats right he lied to me..... This might sound stupid, but I believe he disappeared because he couldn't take it anymore, all the lies, and aside of that something tells me that he didn't want to hurt me more... He disappeared without telling me the true and i don't know if I'll ever be able to forgive him.... The only thing I can say is that I will always love him and cherish every moment we had together.... I just hope where ever he is he'll be happy..

martpao martpao
18-21, F
3 Responses Feb 24, 2010

don't waste the 3 dreaded words on the wrong peson, because all that follows is heart break. trust me, i know that love hurts

Ouch... I'm sorry, I dunno what to say.... Besides I'm younger than you... But I agree... You need to let go... I'm sure you'll find someone else! ;)

I know he tried his best to change, but he just couldn't, the best thing for me is to forget and let go of the past..