Being Male Sucks!

Football hooligans, abusers, "What you lookin' at?", Wham Bam, Thank You Mam, Unfeeling, Rough, Bad listeners, domestic violence, smelly, thoughtless, domineering, butt ugly poxy bloody men!

I know... I'm one too. Have probably caught all the above in myself and it's bloody awful. I do my damndest to break out of the mould. With this body and set of hormones it does tend to sneak up on you. But it's really no fun being a male.

Looking at a lot of men it makes me ashamed of my sex. Power, war, violence... I hate all of it!

Perhaps if we all swapped sexes at about 35. Not these imperfect operations available at the the moment. But properly... Maybe if we saw it from both sides the world would be a better place :)
Lazarus42 Lazarus42
46-50, M
14 Responses Oct 20, 2007

I would hate being a man too if most of my relationships revolved these type of boys/men. My brother and others in my family are like that, so I was glad to disassociate myself from them when I grew up. While there are some biological challenges for us, such as our cognitive development is lagging behind until early thirties and the constant movement in our pants which is distracting, we are not a hopeless lot. Fortunately, I now have have male role models and friends that i appreciate that are more like me and not like the types written about here.

well said

In the African creation story, we were originally both sexes in one. And then, rather than eating the forbidden fruit, the original human was separated by reptilian aliens into two sexes, and took away telepathy in favor of language. Then they sent humans to work in gold mines for the rest of their lives.

I agree with the poster. I hate being male my self. I hate the macho bull ****. Brutes that are smelly and disgusting. I truly do not see why or how any woman could be attracted to males. Then again I am not female so I do not have there perspective. But with the issues in mind about female problems I would still trade in a second instead of staying what I was born as.

For the record I also feel bad saying that because I believe in God and part of me does not believe God can make mistakes. There must be a reason I was born male I just can't see it. My personal opinion about my self and other males is YUCK!! Jesus exempted from that

At least you can control what your body does. (for the most part) I understand your frustration with gender roles, yes, they suck. I feel the same way about being a woman. I would trade genders with a man in a heartbeat. I think there are a lot of individuals who would love to see gender roles and stereotypes disappear forever.<br />
<br />
That being said, I'm in a financial situation in which I'm barely scraping by. I can't afford to replace my bras which are worn out and falling apart, thus, very uncomfortable. (and going without isn't exactly an option) I'm rationing tampons and spent a good portion of my workday folding and rolling up squares of toilet paper to stop the leak. It's miserable. I wish I could have some control over these things, or just not deal with them at all. I've tried everything. As far as I know, men don't have any extra mandatory expenses that don't apply to women as well (example: men must shave, therefore purchase razors; but women also do this. I've tried growing it all out, but the results were disastrous, don't even get me started.) I don't know what the answer to this is Government subsidized feminine hygiene products? I don't think that would give me the feeling of self-control which is what I really want.<br />
<br />
I think if you could be a woman, a real woman-not a man with an operation- you would discover a whole new world of self-hatred.

I agree. Beyond just the whole "bodily function" thing. One more "externally based." Sorry you have to go through such hardships. Guess both genders have it rough.

I know this sounds sadistic, and goodness knows I don't mean it in such a way... but it's such a relief to see that men don't think it's a "NATURAL" or "inborn" thing to be proud of mindless brutality. Phew!<br />
<br />
It's hard having to constantly repeat that there's more to men than sub-human flim-flammery nonsense... but with the kind of counters the media/public tend to display... you'd think you'd have to question whether men are even part of the human race! Hmm... makes me suspicious on the agenda of the media. Apparently they're interest lies in making money off of such propaganda and insulting stereotypes. <br />
<br />
Very damaging.

i would rahter be female and hate being a man because men grow beards but if they dont want a beard they have to shave every flipping day whereas women dont have to think about facial hair. Although woman grow body hair it is so much more fine and dainty and soft which they shave but mens body hair grows nearly all over the body black, dark, thick, course, rough and tough but men are required to leave it hanging there like 'The hanging garden of Babylon'. Womans skin is silky, soft, gentle, velvety, porcelain like and the male skin is not. Female features like the face is so much simpler, so much rounder than a mans who face and facial features are so much more squarer and so more prominant and with a sugnificance. Women wear make-up, perfume e.t.c without getting laughed at, men are taller then women,most women are smaller and have smaller hands feet e.t.c. i could go on why I HATE being a man

Think of it like this. Girls have to shave their legs, underarms (and some girls get facial hair and have to get rid of it) And....other areas. I'm a girl, so I can't say i know how you feel, but sometimes, I hate being a woman, so then again, I kinda understand. Most girls hate that they are smaller than men. Because we're viewed as weaker (which is normally true) but we're viewed as wimps because of it. It sucks. Both genders have their ups and downs.

Good post Sloosh. The machosimo-"doctrine" impossed onto male-persons can certainly be quite suffocating sometimes in today's society.<br />
<br />
Similar points were being brought up in this article:<br />

I relish in my manhood. I see it not as a curse but as a blessing. Perhaps you should look how you can be a better man. Being male is not your fault, but hating yourself does you no good. Being an overly sensitive man won't get you far. Yeah there are some men who do bad things, you may have made some mistakes but it not your manhood that is the problem. You won't win women over by hating your manhood. Women in my experience want men to be men. They can't define that for you, you have to define it for yourself. Decide what type of person you wanna be, go after your dreams. I love me, I wouldn't want to be a woman for the world. But hey there are advantages on both sides of the fence. I can't blame myself for what other people did. I can only be responsible for my life and the choices I make. The next day I try and do better.

I have to totally agree with the theme of this thread: being male can suck. I, being a male of 44 years, thoroughly know this to be true. It's more sensitive males who suffer the most from being lumped in with all the course, callous, 'boys will be boys' beer drinkin' belchin' fartin' yahoos. It's hard being a sensitive male. Often women don't like you either. Why? "You're not a "man"! So it's a lose-lose situation oftentimes. When boys grow up, on the playground and at school, the group dynamic of reinforcing masculine, aggressive behavior really kicks in: any sensitivity, or feminine qualities are ruthlessly and viciously attacked by the more "male" boys: sensitive boys are ostracized, called "**********" or "***" or "ladyboy", etc. They also are regularly punched, beaten up, etc. In this way boys who would be otherwise more sensitive are forced into the closet, and forced to act "like a man". It's all horrible. We talk about this modern day and age as liberated. It isn't all that liberated in some ways. Sometimes familiarity breeds blindness to implied male dominated culture: women can wear men's clothing--pants, male style shirts, etc. But men cannot wear women's clothing without immediate censure, being laughed at, being kicked out, etc. This implies the clothing women wear symbolizes weakness or something when a man--the so-called dominant sex--wears a skirt he is demoting his status. It's not fair! Getting back to the main point...I think the basic role offered to men in modern western society is narrow and a bit dehumanising. Even the clothing options for men are far more narrow than for women. Anyways that's my two cents: being a guy sucks alot of the time. Oh--another point: men are loners, and women support each other: men aren't allowed to open up to each other emotionally...again you are labeled a whiner, sissy, loser, etc. "Be a man, dude"! Stop ******* whining about your life and fix it!" Typical bullshit advice you get from your guy friends over a beer. Pathetic. So, men usually suffer alone with their personal issues unlike women. Just thought I'd toss that thought in, too. Finally, I know women have many challenges and struggles just like men do....but I at times tire of feminists who act like men have it so great in life, enjoy all this status, etc. Because this is not entirely accurate.

You'd never get me out of the bubblebath with the waterproof rabbit, pulsed shower head and "Vibrance" razor for girls i'm afraid. <br><br><br />
<br><br><br />
"Plateau! Get lost, not coming out!"

Swap genders at 35, huh? Interesting. How about just for one day? Play a game? *If you could have an opposite gender body for a 24 hr. time period, what would you do with it? I'll go first...<br />
<br />
* Shave my face<br />
* Go do a lay-up, and hang on the rim<br />
* Whip it out, and **** on some arsehole that sorely deserved it<br />
* Go to a gym, and see how much weight I could lift<br />
* See how fast I could run<br />
* **** off<br />
* Clean the dust bunnies on top of the icebox<br />
* Go to the Japanese all you can eat sushi buffet, and CLEAN HOUSE!!! ( bigger tummy )<br />
<br />
I think I would also look/listen to something that was familiar - Vivaldi "Spring"/Monet's "Water Lilies" - does it look/sound any different? I'd walk around out in a crowded street, too. What would it be like to see the world from such a different perspective? ( I'm only a scant 5'2", so experiencing the world from a foot above, would be pretty cool. ) I think I'd actually LIKE to be able to bump my head on something for a change. ( I can honestly say I've never bumped my head on anything - EVER. ) I've been stepped on in crowds, patted on the head, picked up, pulled onto laps, bullied for space on public transport, and even given the kiddie menu at restaurants. So, yes, I would DEFINATELY love to have a male body for the day!<br />
<br />
Okay - quid pro quo. ( Your turn ) What would you do if you had a female body for the day?

Great reply!!!

Another example on the radio this morning of men's crass, unthinking stupidity. Cardinal Cormac Murphy O'Connor, Archbishop of Westminster talking about abortion. He wants to get rid of it completely! Two middle aged men talking bollocks about denying women control of their bodies. First thing my partner said was "I'd like to see him keep up that view if his daughter became pregnant due to rape!"<br />
<br />
It's everywhere. Here in EP there are hundreds of stories of hurt, pain, damage and disgust caused my men. OK, i agree there are some men damaged by women. But what caused these girls to fight back? If you look at the numbers it's men in the vast majority that cause the problem. <br />
<br />
The thing is, no matter how hard you try to learn, listen, love and be a considerate man and get rid of these misogynistic, demeaning, callous behaviours and attitudes (i'm not perfect either, but i'm trying...) you get tarred with the same brush. <br />
<br />
Walking back from the shop on the corner late at night a few days ago. I was perhaps ten paces behind a young woman. She sensed someone behind her and looked back. <br />
She quickly turned back to avoid eye contact and doubled her walking speed... I crossed over to the other side of the road so as not to freak her out, you could read her fear in her body language. <br />
<br />
This is what i mean by tarred with the same brush. She was right to be fearful, but not of me. But there is no way she could know that. Just by inhabiting this body i trigger her fear. It's horrible!<br />
<br />
I know it's not all men... but just take a look around the planet and make a mental note of which sex is causing most pain and hurt. There were no women in the 911 aircraft, no women taliban, Bush, Blaire, Hitler, Mussolini... all men. Since the birth of the three Abrahamic religions 2000 years ago the dominance of men and the subjugation of women has been engrained into society and is to this day. The bible, torah and qur'an are testament ( no pun intended ) to the paternalistic sky gods <br />
of bronze age society. Men as the only true conduit between their invisible friend and humanity, women seen as unclean and as little more than chattels. Fantasies invented by men to retain and sanctify their dominance.<br />
<br />
It's about time things change... long, long overdue.<br />
<br />
This mechanism of engendering fear and triggering memories of abuse in women by the simple fact of my gender depresses me greatly. I'm at a total loss how i can change this.

I know you wrote this ages ago, but I just wanted to remark that you're a very compassionate and reflective individual. And that alone heals my heart a bit by how horrible this world constructed (social conditioning-wise.) Guys have it bad cause they're considered "sissies" if they act like human being. Human being? Please! They need to be sub-human walking penises thinking about women 24/7. And if they're not bragging about their "manhoods" being "hard and ready" then they're gay (somehow?) And heaven forbid anyone be gay! lol Then we have women who are trained to be reflective, communicative and expecting men to be their "superiors," as in "evolved" with communication and deeper understanding, only to be recieved with a carelessly primitive "grunt" and "groin-scratch." Hah! No wonder we have trouble.

What bothers me are little things that show a *higher* issue. Like, calling someone a "dog" is not bad, unless the dog is female (b*tch) THEN it's an insult! Women have a ton of lowly words to control them, (sl*t, b*tch, *****, c*nt, etc) whereas men hardly get any besides "jerk, creep, b*st*rd" (the last implying he doesn't have a father, so he was raised by his mother - a female - gasp!) etc.

Then playing video games and seeing how "equal" men and women are! 8 male characters with diverse traits: 1 is quirky, 2 is funny, 3 is grimy, 4 is the hero! 5 is the serious one, 6 is the cool one, 7 is the arrogant one, 8 is the quiet one. And ONE female who is hypersexualized and has no other trait other than "female." LOL Wtf is that?!

The fact that people consider that "totally equal" (as it's a common video game fad even in modern society) is a problem.

But hey! She's kicking *** whilst jiggling her large breasts at every move, right? What more could we want?? xD

So you see? With that kind of social conditioning, is it any wonder why the genders are separated and misunderstanding each other? I hope one day humanity will evolve.

I used to feel like this a lot.<br />
<br />
Then I thought about how badly behaved many women are, and also about how they are subjected to an equally close-minded and oppressive set of gender stereotypes. <br />
<br />
Then I learned more about what true, mature masculinity and manhood is about. Since then, I've stopped hating being a man. I do, however, have a lot of anger at immature men, and am very frustrated at a culture that has no mechanisms nor desire to see either men nor women mature properly.