I Hate Him, Specifically
Being married is work, I know that and have worked my *** off for 14 years to try to have a happy marriage, and a normal happy family for my kids, but he just will not let that happen. He tells me I am stupid and an idiot on almost a daily basis, even though I am sure enough of myself to know that is not true. Is his attitude a product of my being college educated and him never finishing high school? Maybe. Is it because he has a limp ****? Maybe. Is it because he was abused as a child? Maybe. But what I do know for sure is that he is just like his dad. I used to feel so sorry for his step mom, and frankly, used to feel sorry for myself for making such a stupid decision to be with this man who I have no love for at all. But the one thing I do not regret at all are my kids. I love my two girls with my whole being, and their happiness and well being is the first thing I think about in the morning, and the last thing I think about at night. They deserve so much better than they get, I love the saying that children are better off being from a broken home than in one, so I am dismantling our broken home just as soon as I can. They deserve better and I deserve better. They should see what a healthy man looks like and how a healthy man behaves. Not the raging name calling that is the core of their father. I hate being married, wish I wasn't almost every waking moment.