It's All My Fault

I'm not as bad as I look. It's not all about the looks I guess. I'm simply a *****. I'm moody, pretentious and a liar. Yet I'm too shy, has very low self-esteem and paranoid. I wish I could do some sort of reset to start all over again. I wish I could change the things I've said in the past. I wish I'd been funnier, nicer and more outgoing. Now everybody thinks I'm a dork, in a really annoying, unattractive way. I wanna be somewhere else and start all over. I can't take back what I've done and what I've said. Every time I think about it I cringe and hope I die. There are so many people I wanna get close with but feel like it's too late to reach out. I used to worry over not being skinny enough. Now all I can think is how most people were right when they told me I'm boring. I guess I'll have to live with it. I feel so much uglier than that guy on the group logo. All he needs to do is wipe that snort off his face and voila! I need so much work.