Really Dreading Christmas This Year ...

My story is a bit grim. It all started 3 yrs ago. My dad died on the 19th December, he had been ill for a while but died unexpected from something else. I spent that Christmas Eve at the Chapel of Rest and Christmas Day sorting out songs/hymns for his funeral. Then my partner at the time dumped me by phone on Boxing Day. My own health has been bad for a long time and has got worse since these events. I am now on my own and dreading Christmas since about October. Things seem worse this year ... Not sure why. Maybe it's cause all my friends have partners ? Am not sure. I don't have much family and they live a long way away. What do I say to all the people calling me Grinch and Scrooge this year ? What can I do to make things a little less lonely on the day ? I now hate this time of year with passion. All the TV ads showing happy families, people spending money they haven't got. It feels like a really selfish time of year to me now ...  Oh, and I really miss my dad who was a lovely man,
Engel234 Engel234
41-45, F
1 Response Dec 13, 2012

I am having a hard time with Christmas this year also. My relationship ended 4 months ago and last christmas was such a hopeful time having just met her in November. I still feel the loss. I want to move on and meet someone new but that has not happened yet. I am going to a movie and out to dinner with friends on Christmas. I am so lucky to have them as staying home alone would really hurt. Letting the people I know know I am hurting is hard but then there is some support at least.