Post

Alone In My Room...

 Im a freshman in college, and I thought that this was going to be the best time of my life, I have great classes and awesome roommates.  The only problem is that i've never been good at making friends and here it seemed that everyone had their group by the second day of college, and I seemed to have missed a certain deadline.  I spend almost every night in my room and always hang out with my roommate and her friends, who I don't really like very much.  I try talking to people but they seem as though they arn't interest in becoming friends with anyone else anymore.  Im scared that I'll be alone for the next four years, spending friday nights on my computer, wishing someone would facebook chat me asking to do something.  I realize how pathetic this sounds but I really do try to make friends, I will talk to someone for a while and when we're done they just walk away and I never see them again.  I can't talk to my parents about this and all my friends from home are loving college and just don't understand.  I hate college.

melseeg melseeg 18-21, F 8 Responses Oct 9, 2009

Your Response

Cancel

Word. I totally feel you.

I was in the exact same situation when I was a freshman in college. It was the same way where I went (Goucher College in Baltimore, MD). Everyone else found a clique to join within the first week or two. I had a nice roommate, but didn't have much luck finding anyone who had anything in common with me, and if they did, they weren't interested in me because they correctly assumed I didn't deal drugs or have a fake ID. I wasn't happy, but I waited it out to see if things got better, but it didn't. I put up with it for four years. I got some unpaid internships, a piece of paper, a strong desire to leave the country, and a nearly empty bank account. That's about all I really got out of college. So, if you still feel the same way by the end of the semester, consider other options. Hopefully, the economy will recover enough over the next three or four years that a Bachelor's degree in anything other than engineering will mean something to potential employers. For now, the things most likely to get you a job and/or financial security are lots of experience, being good at math and science, fluency in Arabic, and being married or related to someone with enough money to provide for all of your expenses for the next ten years. In my experience, maintaining your sanity may be worth more than four years' tuition. Please don't waste time and money on something that doesn't suit you.

Hey guys. Its a good feeling knowing that im not the only one in this situations, though I do feel bad for you guys.<br />
Unfortunately one of the roommates (the one i like) is being forced to leave because on of her loans fell through and she owes our school $13,000. I can't believe this is happening to her, especially since she really belongs at this school.<br />
Im really scared of what is going to happen when she leaves, and how alone im going to be. College just really keeps getting worse and worse.

This is how I feel! I go to a two-year and everyone in my dorm is a sophomore. They aren't interested in being my friend because they already have friends from last year.<br />
I hang out in my room a lot.

thats exactly how I feel! I don't know why, but everyone here is already in their friend groups. Nobody really invites me to do anything with them, and it only ends up that I go out with them or eat dinner with them because I happen to see them on my way to the dining hall. Its really sad, and makes me wonder if anyone would even miss me if i transferred and left here. or even if they would say "where did she go??"<br />
<br />
i miss my high school friends so much, but they have all made new friends. its really sad.

wow. i am in EXACTLY the same situation as you. i feel like i could have written that.<br />
i hate it. <br />
when i'm walking through campus, there are a lot of people who say hi to me. when i'm in a class or doing some sort of activity there are usually people who i'm able to talk to and have fun with. and i get along fine with my roommate, and her friends too. but they're her friends. i never feel like they're mine, too. it seems like she invites me places because she feels sorry for me. i honestly feel like i have zero friends here. for a while i was genuinely friends with this guy, but he kept wanting more and now it's all screwed up and he's just an *******.<br />
i've never been this lonely before in my life. i'm actually missing high school & my high school friends, even though when i was in high school, all i wanted was to go to college.<br />
i feel like everyone already has their friend groups established, and no one wants any more. i really hate it.

wow. i am in EXACTLY the same situation as you. i feel like i could have written that.<br />
i hate it. <br />
when i'm walking through campus, there are a lot of people who say hi to me. when i'm in a class or doing some sort of activity there are usually people who i'm able to talk to and have fun with. and i get along fine with my roommate, and her friends too. but they're her friends. i never feel like they're mine, too. it seems like she invites me places because she feels sorry for me. i honestly feel like i have zero friends here. for a while i was genuinely friends with this guy, but he kept wanting more and now it's all screwed up and he's just an *******.<br />
i've never been this lonely before in my life. i'm actually missing high school & my high school friends, even though when i was in high school, all i wanted was to go to college.<br />
i feel like everyone already has their friend groups established, and no one wants any more. i really hate it.

It took me a while to make friends at college, though this may have been partly because I stayed with an aunt who lived within a convenient distance rather than in the university residences. Friends did come eventually however. As you get involved with people doing different activities you can't help but make friends, it's jsut that some people take longer than others to achieve this. Have you asked yourself why you don't like your roommate's friends? I had one close friend from day one at college, and I didn't like his friends much, but it dawned on me later that, as I was rather shy, I was a bit clingy with that friend and therefore saw his other friends as a kind of threat. I became friends of a sort with them, though it took time. Dislike has a way of showing itself, and a few compliments and smiles can go a long way. They may seem forced at first, but if they reciprocate you may find yourself warming to them. It also sometimes seems that the grass is greener, and that other people seem to have loads of friends, but I found out later that one or two of these had all kinds of emotional and other problems and I seemed to emerge from college in a better position to face the world than they did.