Social Group With Double Standards

I was at a party last night. This is a gathering of couples more or less in the same financial strata with a few exceptions.

While most of the guys are level headed and fun to be with , there is a pretty strong double standard of behavoiur which goes on in the group with a few pretentious snobs trying to talk down to those they consider lesser than them while sucking up to those who they consider better than them financially.

I lost my cool a little bit  last night when one of the snobs tried talking down to me and basically called him out on it. Unfortunately I called him an ******* while calling out the behavior.

While I think I did the right thing by calling out the behaviour I did err by calling him an ******* too. It was just a momentary lapse and not something said in great anger (I could make a strong argument saying it was said jokingly) but this guy is trying to use it against me.

Frankly the only reason I go to these parties is because my wife enjoy's them and I suspect most of the guys feel the same way. I personally would rather not have friends like this person to begin with anyway but to keep within the group I cannot avoid him indefinitely.

GoldenCanucks GoldenCanucks
36-40, M
1 Response Mar 14, 2010

Sounds like the guy's an insecure, pretentious *****. I would have called him an *******, too.<br />
But I probably wouldn't be sorry about it afterwards, like you sound to be.<br />
If others in the group have seen this behaviour from him (which will include any witnesses to the name-calling incident), then he'll have a really hard time trying to make you out to be the bad guy.<br />
If they haven't seen him act this way, then being sickeningly nice to the guy in public will give them plenty of reasons to think that the guy's full of it if he's telling them you bitched him out and called him an *******. Eventually, it'll seem like he's being a vindictive ***** to you for no reason at all, and others will start to get pissed off at him, too.

Isn't that perpetuating the same linear, pretentious mindset? Sometimes, being genuine is not always comfortable.